Life is great

I have been thinking the whole week about my future projects for 2008 and it’s not going to be an easy task.

But let me go back a year or two. When I lost my job (see blog entries 2005) I just had a little income and started to volunteer with Hope an HIV/AIDS NGO'S in Cape Town and did various voluntary work at institutions. (Prisons, hospitals and so on) I was so happy been in the field that I love.

I saw the short comings within the communities that I was working in. I used all my resources (available funds if it was not for my dad) my hope was that someone would recognise my talent and efforts and employ me on a full time basis but to no avail.

Many people tried to assist me and one company could only employ me on an ad hoc basis but at lease the paid me.

There is so much red tape and on the other hand people want to use your available talents for free, which I don’t have a problem with but in the end you suffer.

Currently I am employed after a very long time and have my dignity and self respect back that I don’t have to rely on anyone. The salary might not be great but because of previous events out of my control a lot of my work has suffered.

But, I have never given up or surrendered at any time. If it was not for my partner who believed in me I would still be on the broken track.

I work from 8.30am – 5.30pm (sometimes 5pm) without taking lunch and sometimes due to the pressure not even a bite to eat. I am a contract worker so every minute I take for a smoke break (yes I smoke and I know it’s not healthy but it’s my only vice) or I am sick I don’t get paid.

Until such time which has been over a year now, I am employed as a full time worker (and that applies to my partner as well) we have to work and maintain good health or we will not get paid. That’s the lot for contract workers.

But every day is a blessing to me. But I miss the basic things in life like medical aid and gym. I can’t afford it at this time of my life and neither can I afford to buy myself a laptop to continue the project that I am working on. So every available spare minute that I have to work on drafts and let my partner look at them since he is the web developer.

I don’t have much of a social life. He is so over worked due to the pressure to complete the new company site he is tired and we try and work our lives around that.

At present for the next two weeks he is working 7 days a week and I am sitting here at home updating my blog and working on my project which I know is going to be life changing for millions of those suffering from HIV once I have the final draft and proposal but that is going to take time.

Let me give you a glimpse of my work week, I start at 8-8.30am with GIS Mapping and technical support queries one after the other and don’t leave my desk even when I do have the time to eat. The only time that I do is for three or five minutes or a puff. Even then if the phone rings I have to go back to my desk and take care of the incoming query.

I am so tired when I get home I just glance at my emails and fall asleep and that applies to my partner as well.

There are so many time obstacles but I believe that help is on the way. I have always believed that one should work to the sweat of your brow. (Biblical quote) I have always had an excellent work record with the companies that I have worked for. That includes the voluntary work with various agencies.

Its not easy writing an autobiography and a book based on your life translated by poetry and philosophy and trying to keep up when one is so busy. Dementia management is a daily requirement and patience is required by all that is around you.

I refuse to surrender or give up the projects no matter how long it will take. There is no room for surrender but I am not ashamed to admit that I do need assistance.

I have so many experiences to share in conjunction with poetry and philosophy which I will publish as soon as I find the original records which I have filed away some time ago just in case my computer crashed. Which it did so I have to reconcile many years of work and republish them.

My hope is friends, that there is someone out there that will take a look at my wish list and take the time to contact me and assist me.

Help me to move people out of the darkness into the light. Give them hope and bring NGO’S together under one data base (surplus data base) and make a huge impact on the African continent. That all can be self sufficient.

Mark Gavin Farrell

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