The Rose Of Life The Journey Living With HIV

Happy Holidays All

2011-12-10T08:04:00.001+02:00

Its that time of year, where we are all going to celebrate the holidays. I wish you all happy holidays!

May you find peace and joy

The power within

2011-09-11T22:56:00.001+02:00

The greatest gift I have always said is wisdom in conjunction with love.

Reach out to someone you know today and give them hope not in humanity only but in themselves.

In South Africa we have become imprisoned in our homes due to the high crime and I and my spouse have been victims three times and have bounced right back.

It got so bad that one grows suspicious of anyone and that is not the way to live. Insurance is sky high and you have to make so many stringent changes not just to your life but to your home by installing double gates at your entrance, electric fencing and hope to keep the bad ones out.

But even that does not bring you security.

Instead we let our fears and insecurities start ruling us and we see and imagine things.

Lets take the negative out of all of this and do something constructive. Let us embrace the problem we have and sharpen our skills so that we don't fall into the trap of crime.

If a community stands together then that will lesson the chance of crime as everyone will be alert and work together to make the community safe.

This problem we have with crime is a world wide problem, where there is poverty there is crime.

That is why I said in my previous post we must say “thank you” for what we have and try and give to those who dont have.

We have the power within not just to change ourselves but our community and those less fortunate than us.

The smallest thank you go’s a mile

2011-09-11T22:05:00.001+02:00

The smallest thank you go’s a mile in any ones life.

Just saying thank you for the smallest thing makes a difference in anyone's life

Every day we have those who are less fortunate and struggle to make ends meet and yet they still appreciate the little things in life.

The smallest gift they cherish with all their hart and soul, we take many things for granted such as our home, car and other luxury things as a day to day thing.

But, do we ever sit back and say thank you God for such a beautiful day and that you have looked after me with your wisdom and love.

Sunday

2011-09-11T12:03:00.001+02:00

Well its been some time since I have updated my blog.

Well its been more than 2yrs of marriage and we are still going strong from strength to strength. Yeh there are many obstacles in the way and no journey has no bumps, I mean life would not be the same without them lol

We in return inspire and listen to each other and of course we have the temper tantrum now and then but before the sun rises or sets we laugh about it.

Many of you are married and have gone through trials and tribulations and have overcome.

Let us all overcome in our marriages and live life to the fullest

Mark Farrell-Watling

Our first holiday for more than 7 days

2011-05-01T03:20:00.001+02:00

Well its the first time that Derek and I have had a holiday for more than 7 days and believe me we both needed it.

Update

2011-03-31T13:04:00.001+02:00

Well folks its been some time since I have updated my bog. I am doing fine and the marriage is doing very well and we are blessed in all things.

Yes we are going through a tough time due to the high costs of life and our health is excellent and our viral loads are undetectable for quite a few years now.

I want to encourage you to take your ARV’s every day and live a healthy lifestyle.

Don’t let life get you down, use your wisdom that you have obtained along the road way of life.

Always bring out the best of yourself and no matter how bad things may be, there is an outcome

Life is great, peachy lol.

2010-08-09T19:54:00.001+02:00

Well its been a hell of a week past, work was very busy.

Derek and myself are doing well and one has to do the very best in the time we as we journey together along the path of life itself.

I am looking forward to going away to Greyton on the 24th of September and soon on the 15th of August I will be 46!!!!!!!!!!

Yeeeeeeeeeeesh! I am getting old lol.

I love life to the fullest and am doing well on the ARV’s hence I always say please take your meds every day and you will live a long and healthy life.

I am busy with some cam journals which I will post soon, so that it can empower you and enhance your life as well.

Love you all

Mark

Wisdom

2010-07-14T19:54:00.001+02:00

Well guys its important to remember who we are and not forget our principles and morals of life. Wisdom as I have always said is the greatest gift of all.

We have to love each other with unconditional acceptance and build, encourage one another in all things.

Here I am one year and a bit after the wedding day and dam I feel great and that same fire of love still burns deep within me every second of the day.

Living with HIV for such a long time over two decades now and I have overcome.

Life is what you make it and what you do with every precious second in the day.

Live life to the fullest and walk the journey of life and accept all things that come your way and strengthen yourself with the wisdom you gain that you may empower those who come across your way so that they may overcome and be overcomes too.

Update

2010-07-01T23:08:00.001+02:00

Well it been over a year since we have been married and so many things have changed.

We have to live life to the fullest and be accept the things that come our way and overcome. Marriage is a journey between two people who love each other and grow together.

Inspire and allow wisdom to take them into the future.

This past year and a bit so many things have transpired and in my next update I will share some of the events and bring to you inspiration, its now almost 21yrs that I have been living with HIV and I am in very good health.

That is why I always say life is worth living and there is always hope

Hi there

2010-06-23T23:15:00.001+02:00

I will be updated my blog soon

Today I Celebrate 45yrs Of Life

2009-08-15T00:17:00.001+02:00

As I reflect on the past 45yrs of my life and the journey that I have travelled, I marvel at life itself. It has been a privilege to be able to walk the the path of life and gain so much understanding of others and wisdom which I cherish.

I love my husband very much and am overjoyed to have him at my side to share this special day with me and milestone in life.

Let us all be blessed and continue to do good and flourish within our inner souls and bring the very best of ourselves to the fore.

Mark Gavin Farrell-Watling

Quote of the Day:
Progress depends on people knowing they'll be able to profit from their ideas.
--Deborah Neville

Hi guys

2009-07-18T13:59:00.001+02:00

Well its been such along time since I have updated this blog. I have been distracted with work which really is no excuse amongst other things.

I am working very hard and work takes up allot of my time over the last few months. Derek and I are doing very well and are also feeling the economic pinch. There are many things which we would love to do like visit friends in France and Germany but at this present time our finances do not permit that.

Derek has taught me to pay your debt first.

The path that we are on at the moment is to get our debt settled and then think of going to Germany, Canada and France.

Its better to have capital at hand which you know that you do have available than running yourself into debt and not been able to get out of it.

Today is Madiba’s birthday and we should all give 67min of our time to do something for someone else who is in need.

We have to be responsible with our fiances now and make the best of each situation as it arises and not let ourselves be fooled by using the credit available that we may have then paying it back plus interest and putting ourselves in a difficult situation.

I love my spouse and life itself. We have come thus far and together we shall overcome all obstacles that come our way, that is what a partnership is all about.

This month I had the privileged of meeting Derek’s Aunt and Uncle and they where great they accepted me as their son in law and it was wonderful. I can’t even begin to tell you how loved and accepted I feel by Derek’s family, since I have lost mine and have lost contact with my aunts and uncles and some of them have passed on over the years.

I miss my cousins and nephews which I too have lost contact with.

As I have always said family is so important and the one that now has accepted me into the family has made me feel blessed.

I will update soon again

Mark

Married and happy

2009-05-15T22:02:00.001+02:00

Married life is great, yeh, yeh I know the sceptics say you guys have just been married for two month’s.

We took the time to get to know each other from the inside out for over two years and then tied the knot. I believe that love and unconditional acceptance of one’s spouse is the key to a long successful marriage.

Work has been great and as some of you might not know I was taken down for a week with a chest infection but I am now ok.

One of the greatest attributes that I have is wisdom, compassion and understanding.

I always have given Derek love and unconditional acceptance for who he is. He has total freedom to be himself and has transformed from been quiet to been more positive and sharing with his emotions and thoughts.

We can never change another by force, change as I have said comes through a long journey with the one that you love, through understanding, unconditional love, acceptance and going the extra mile for each other.

I have close friends and I love them equal and always give them my best and hold them close to my heart.

Don’t let your relationship go under but rather work at a resolution of resolve, divorce is not an option, if in the first place you committed yourselves to each other.

May you all have a blessed day

Love Mark

A new era of government dawns for South Africa

2009-05-09T16:38:00.001+02:00

South African Government (Pretoria) South Africa: Address by His Excellency Mr Jacob Zuma on the Occasion of His Inauguration as

Today at 16:36 | Edit note | Delete

Union Buildings

President Of The Republic Of South Africa

South African Government (Pretoria)
South Africa: Address by His Excellency Mr Jacob Zuma on the Occasion of His Inauguration as Fourth President of the Republic of South Africa
Jacob Zuma
9 May 2009
document
Your Majesties,
Your Royal Highnesses,
Your Excellencies Heads of State and Government and Leaders and Members of delegations,
Chairpersons of the African Union and the African Commission,
Esteemed Members of the Order of Mapungubwe, our icon the Hon Nelson Mandela, and the Hon Thabo Mbeki,
Your Excellencies, Ambassadors and High Commissioners,
Speaker of the National Assembly, Max Sisulu,
Chief Justice, Pius Langa,
Members of the Diplomatic corps,
Mama Albertina Sisulu and all veterans of our struggle,
Distinguished guests, ladies and gentlemen,
On this day, a decade and a half ago, Nelson Rolihlahla Mandela was formally elected as the first President of a democratic South Africa.
At that moment a new nation was born, a nation founded on the fundamental principles of human dignity and equal rights for all.
A nation founded on the promise that ‘never, never and never again’ would this land experience the oppression of one by another.
Today, a decade and a half later, we gather here to reaffirm the promise of that great day.
We gather here determined to renew that most solemn undertaking, to build a society in which all people are freed from the shackles of discrimination, exploitation, want and disease.
We gather here determined that the struggles and sacrifices of our people over many decades shall not be in vain.
Instead, they shall inspire us to complete the task for which so much blood was shed, and so much hardship endured. This is a moment of renewal.
When Madiba took the oath of office on the 10th of May 1994, it was one of the greatest historic moments of our country, Africa and the African diaspora.
Madiba healed our wounds and established the rainbow nation very firmly.
He set us on the path of nation building and prosperity and made us a respected member of the world community of nations. He taught us that all South Africans have equal claim to this country, and that there can be no lasting peace unless all of us, black and white, learned to live together in harmony and peace.
He made reconciliation the central theme of his term of office.
We will not deviate from that nation-building task. Thank you Madiba, for showing us the way.
I would also like to acknowledge the former second Deputy President of the democratic republic, the Hon FW de Klerk, who worked with Madiba in the resolution of the apartheid conflict, and participated in shaping a new South Africa.
Your Excellencies, Ladies and gentlemen,
In June 1999, former President Mbeki came to this very podium to take the oath of office, as the second President of the Republic. He took the country forward as a true statesman.
He made a remarkable contribution towards strengthening our democracy, and laid a firm foundation for economic growth and development.
He made our country an integral part of the continent and worked tirelessly for an African rebirth. Through his leadership, South Africa’s stature grew in the continent and globally.
In his last address to the nation as Head of State in September last year, he demonstrated his patriotism, and put the interests of the country above his personal interests.
Thank you Zizi for demonstrating a character that the ANC had always embodied since 1912.
Your Excellencies, ladies and gentleman, the nation is equally indebted to my friend, comrade and brother, President Kgalema Motlanthe.
He came into office during a period of great anxiety, and brought about calm, stability and certainty. He has led us in a very capable manner and the transition has become remarkably smooth and well managed.
On behalf of the nation, let me express our sincerest gratitude to President Motlanthe for patriotic service to the nation. Motlanthe! Bakone! Mmadiboka, seboka, dikgomo lebatho!
Today, as I take this solemn Oath of Office as the Fourth President of the Republic of South Africa, I do so deeply conscious of the responsibilities that you, the people of our country are entrusting in me.
I commit myself to the service of our nation with dedication, commitment, discipline, integrity, hard work and passion.
There is a lot to be done. More than 11,6 million South Africans voted for the ANC, based on the programme put before them.
We are now called upon to implement our Manifesto. The dreams and hopes of all the people of our country must be fulfilled. There is no place for complacency, no place for cynicism, no place for excuses.
Everything we do must contribute in a direct and meaningful way to the improvement of the lives of our people.
Your Majesties, Your Royal Highnesses, Your Excellencies,
We make a commitment here and now, before the eyes of the world, that:
For as long as there are South Africans who die from preventable disease;
For as long as there are workers who struggle to feed their families;
For as long as there are communities without clean water, decent shelter or proper sanitation;
For as long as there are rural dwellers unable to make a decent living from the land on which they live;
For as long as there are women who are subjected to discrimination, exploitation or abuse;
For as long as there are children who do not have the means nor the opportunity to receive a decent education;
For as long as there are people who are unable to find work,
we shall not rest, and we dare not falter.
As we apply ourselves to these and other tasks, we must acknowledge that we find ourselves in difficult economic times.
Jobs are being lost in every economy across the world. We will not be spared the negative impact, and are beginning to feel the pinch.
However, the foundations of our economy are strong and we will need to continue to build on them.
This will require more hard work than ever before.
To achieve all our goals, we must hold ourselves to the highest standards of service, probity and integrity. Together we must build a society that prizes excellence and rewards effort, which shuns laziness and incompetence.
We must build a society that draws on the capabilities, energy and promise of all its people.
Fellow South Africans, this is indeed a moment of renewal.
It is an opportunity to rediscover, that which binds us together as a nation.
The unity of our nation should be a priority for all sectors of our society.
We are a people of vastly different experiences, of divergent interests, with widely different views.
Yet we share a common desire for a better life, and to live in peace and harmony.
We share a common conviction that never shall we return to a time of division and strife.
From this common purpose we must forge a partnership for reconstruction, development and progress.
In this partnership there is a place for all South Africans, black and white.
It is a partnership founded on principles of mutual respect and the unfettered expression of different views. We do not seek conformity.
We seek a vibrant, dynamic partnership that is enriched by democratic debate that values diverse views and accommodates dissent.
Therefore, we need to make real the fundamental right of all South Africans to freely express themselves, to protest, to organise, and to practice their faith.
We must defend the freedom of the media, as we seek to promote within it a greater diversity of voices and perspectives.
We must deepen the practice of participatory democracy in all spheres of public life.
We must strengthen the democratic institutions of state, and continually enhance their capacity to serve the people.
We must safeguard the independence and integrity of those institutions tasked with the defence of democracy, and that must act as a check on the abuse of power.
Compatriots, today, we enter a new era in the history of our nation, imbued with a resolve to do everything within our means to build a better life for all our people.
Today, we renew our struggle to forge a nation that is at peace with itself and the world.
As we rejoice in being surrounded by our friends from all over the world, we reiterate our gratitude for the sterling contribution of the international community to our struggle for freedom.
We single out the African continent, for refusing to rest until the southern tip of Africa was free.
We recommit ourselves to continue to be an active member of the international community.
We will continue to use multilateral and bilateral forums and relations to take forward the goals of eradicating global poverty, strengthening peace and security and to promote democracy.
We will promote international friendship and cooperation through amongst others the 2010 FIFA World Cup. South Africa will deliver a world class event that will forever change the perceptions of the international community, and also ensure a lasting legacy for the people of Africa.
Fellow South Africans, let us move forward decisively, together.
Let us build a nation that remains forever mindful of its history, of those who have sacrificed so much, and the many who put down their lives so we can be here today.
A nation filled with the laughter and joy of children.
A nation filled with a hope born of the knowledge that if we work together, we will achieve our dreams.
Your Majesties, Your Royal Highnesses, Your Excellencies, distinguished guests, thank you for gracing this occasion today.
I thank you.
Issued by The Presidency

Update

2009-04-19T21:54:00.001+02:00

Life brings one so many challenges and up’s and down. After two years I finally got hold of one of my debtors and now at last I can settle my debt and start the road of recovery in my personal financial path into the future and this will be the first time that I am able to do it.

For a few years I was not able to honour my debt due to all the past turmoil's with my employers who did not either pay me or long legal battles which cost me dearly.

Currently, I am suffering a bit with a ulcer but that will be seen to on the 28th of this month when I go for a scope. Hospital treatment is not free for those who earn over R5000.00 per month even if you are a few rands over and that is what I have had to learn the hard way.

So for the week that I was in and out and spent hours waiting for results I will pay at least R1000.00 as it is R275.00 or R175.00 per consultation and you have to pay for your own medications.

Currently just for 7 days it costs around about R260.00 and over a month that is over R1000.00 and that is just one medication.

Even with a combined salary we cant afford medical aid and if we could we would have to wait a whole year before we could use it, that is the regulations in South Africa if you are HIV+. (pre existing conditions are not covered for a year) So they could refuse to cover any medical expenses' for a year.

The right thing for me to do now is work on my financial and our future together.

It’s hard work to keep your head above water these days but if you are willing to sacrifice some luxuries which we don't have much of.

We are a simple married couple who don’t live above our means and one thing my spouse has taught me is to pay your debts first and put away money no matter how small a month.

But, alas I can’t do that right now due to the economic climate we all face around the world.

But I am up to the challenge and will overcome this over the next three or four months by tightening my belt.

I will update on a regular basis guys, It’s just been so busy and I have had to adjust to so many things that I have just not had the time to post as regular as I used to.

I love keeping you all informed and as you can see the sun has risen on my life and I have been blessed from the start of this journey over the past few years which is well documented on my blog.

Have a great day all

Mark Farrell-Watling

One week later of married life

2009-03-12T21:44:00.001+02:00

Its really been a blessing been married and the spiritual benefits is endless.

I am still in the phase of accepting that I am married and that I am in a dedicated marriage for life.

I wish the same for all same sex couples that they can have the same commitment and love that we have for each other.

In our journey over the last week we where rather taken aback at some of the attitude of others who fought to long to have the Civil Union Act put into law, to ask why get married?

In any even marriage is not to be taken lightly but a serious decision that will affect you for the rest of your life.

You come to a point after two and half years that you want to take this step and do so freely and live up to the commitment.

I pray that our union will set an example to others to follow and that we may be a blessing to all those that come across our path of life.

I would like to thank all those who came to the wedding and may they all be blessed and it was such a blessing to have those around you whom you love.

I will update again soon – Love Mark

Our Wedding Day 5th Of March 2009

2009-03-07T14:41:00.001+02:00

On Thursday at 14h45 we took our vow’s and we where married.

We are so happy and blessed and tonight will be the reception at Lupo’s in Wynberg.

After 44yrs I have been blessed with the perfect partner for life.

Its not been an easy journey and now we boldly walk together into the future.

From the inception of my blog this is the greatest moment of my life.

And of course sharing this blessed moment with you all

Mark Farrell-Watling

The Importance Of Family

2009-02-22T12:40:00.001+02:00

As you all know now that Derek and I will be married in less than 12 days from now.

Family is important to me, especially from my the one that I am integrating into and my step brothers and sisters.

It has been a long hard walk but the greatest thing is having a family that cares with values and principles.

We have to carry on the traditions and integrity of both family blood lines and respect our elders in both families.

Show love and understanding and commitment and foster and build new relations with both sides of the family and the target will be a whole family united through love and understanding.

As we grow we will embrace all that comes our way with vigour and take step by step until we are over comers.

Every problem shall be a challenge and a privilege and together Derek and I through wisdom shall hold our heads high and be an example that marriage can work and be a success between two men and be respected by the whole family and community.

Its with this hope that we both look into the future and if in the future we have the privilege of been foster parents we will install family values as any other couple would and bring up the child in love and understanding.

I wish you a blessed week and hope this past week went well

Mark

FW: Helen Zille : SA Today - An Open letter to Jacob Zuma on his candidacy for President

2009-02-21T12:14:00.000+02:00

Mark Farrell

Tel: 27 76 280 2833

0762802833

021 689 4021/ 27 21 689 4021

Skype: posboy1

From: DA News [mailto:cindy@da.org.za]
Sent: 19 February 2009 04:05 PM
To: markgavinfarrell@gmail.com
Subject: Helen Zille : SA Today - An Open letter to Jacob Zuma on his candidacy for President

Open letter to Jacob Zuma on his candidacy for President

Dear Mr Zuma

Before your legal team makes representations to the National Prosecuting Authority (NPA) tomorrow, I request that you put your ambitions aside and act in the interests of the country and the Constitution by publicly stepping down as the ANC’s presidential candidate.

Rather than creating a “bad precedent”, as you told your supporters outside the Pietermaritzburg High Court earlier this month, the withdrawal of your candidacy would set an excellent precedent.

It would demonstrate to your fellow South Africans – the people whom you aspire to lead – that real leaders place national interests ahead of personal interests. It would send a clear and powerful message that political leaders must be held to account; that their conduct must be beyond reproach, and their probity must be beyond suspicion.

Above all, it would match in deed your recently-stated commitment to upholding the Constitution and the values that underpin it. If you were to be elected President by the National Assembly without having been exonerated of the charges against you in a court of law, that would seriously undermine the Constitution. In fact, I have been reliably informed by senior members of the bar that your election could be challenged in the Constitutional Court. That is because your presidency would create a conflict of interest between your constitutional role as Head of State and your status as an accused in a matter that has been brought against you by the state itself.

Until such time as you are cleared in a court of law, it is impossible for you to serve your country as its President with any hope of being able to discharge the obligations and responsibilities that all of our presidents have to undertake in terms of the Constitution.

To use a soccer analogy: If you were to become President while still Accused number 1, you would find yourself simultaneously in the same position as the Chiefs’ striker (President) and the Pirates’ goalkeeper (Accused).

The rights of an accused to take on the might of the state in defending himself are incompatible with the obligations of the Head of State to run the country properly, accountably and in a manner responsive to the needs of the people. It is quite intolerable for our state to proceed criminally against its own Head, a Head who is well placed to fund or not fund the prosecution, to influence decisions regarding the state’s stance in appeals and processes, personnel and procedures in the case. As Head of State you appoint the National Director of Public Prosecutions (NDPP). This is akin to the Pirates’ goalkeeper nominating a Pirates’ player to take the last shot for the Chiefs in a penalty shoot out in the cup final.

Although your candidacy may well be an own goal for the ANC, you must withdraw it now for the sake of our constitutional order.

The NPA currently has 18 charges pending against you, many of which were laid for the first time at the end of December 2007. If you do not stand trial on these charges a pall of suspicion will hang over every move you make and every decision you take in the future.

You may have noticed that in mature democracies, unresolved allegations of impropriety send politicians into early, and sometimes temporary, retirement. Yet, you have chosen to pursue your political career (and presidential ambitions), despite the fact that you have not publicly dealt with the serious and varied allegations the prosecution thinks it can prove against you in a court of law.

Your trial must go ahead. Once the criminal proceedings are finally over, you can re-enter the world of politics, unless any sentence imposed precludes you from doing so. However, until then, you are trying to play for both sides at the same time. You can’t. Nobody can. It’s illegal and irrational. Any vote in Parliament in favour of your election as President is open to legal challenge on the basis that it would be invalid for want of consistency with the Constitution.

It is also politically and morally indefensible to persist in your candidacy under current circumstances. Presidents have to work in the political world of perceptions as well as the legal world of facts and rules. And so you must do the right thing and step aside until your innocence is proven in a court of law.

It is not feasible for you to run the country from the dock in Pietermaritzburg. So, in the interests of our country and its Constitution, which you now say you revere as the supreme law, stand back from politics until the criminal case is properly finalised.

Yours sincerely

Helen Zille

Leader of the Democratic Alliance

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A bit of this and a bit of that

2009-02-13T19:44:00.001+02:00

Well its weekend again and I will be meeting some more family members of Derek.

The current ruling party the ANC has definitely failed the people as so many of their own members have migrated to the COPE party.

Now even more corruption has been uncovered by one of their own Carl Nihause but he is innocent until proven guilty, that is the great thing about our constitution.

I am sure that the ANC hold on power and the majority mp’s in parliament will come to an end next year, currently the have the power to change the constitution and sign into law many things just by share majority of votes they hold.

South Africa is due for a political climate change and I hope we are not going to have bloodshed via the various factions that war against each other.

It seems the ANC is almost in a self destruct mode at the moment with the entire on goings within the party itself.

It’s really sad to see what is happening to the ANC which was supposed to be the hope of the country.

Now, its time for change and we will just have to see what prevails at the elections and after.

We as South Africans live in the land of the free with the best constitution in the world brought into existence by the ANC and other parties, together without prejudice.

As you know I rarely make political comments but its time that I did.

Let us hope that after the elections we have a change for all South Africans and a bright future.

Besides the politics, life has been great this week, been hard at work. Its less than 22 days to go now before Derek and I are married and my heart is pounding in excitement knowing that the event draws nearer.

We have to take responsibility for our actions in life and when we recover from the ills that may befall us, rise from the ashes with strength and wisdom that we may in return share the coping mechanisms with others that they may overcome what befalls them.

We have to treat everyone with dignity, love and respect in all things. Spend time and listen and learn.

I have said the greatest gift is wisdom many times and I live by that.

Although I have been through the school of life I am still the student and will remain so for the rest of my life.

It’s the greatest honour and privilege to be able to live with HIV and integrate into my lifestyle and shine in the darkest hour.

Been there for those in need and taking them by the hand and pulling them out of the sandpit of life.

Don’t turn your back on anyone who is in need, but extend your hand in help that the one that you have helped may do the same.

Sometimes its better to sit, stand and then walk the path of life.

May you all have a blessed weekend and I hope that I have brought some joy to you today.

Live healthy and live life

Mark Farrell

Valentines Day 14th Of February 2009

2009-02-10T21:16:00.001+02:00

I would like to share this moment with you. From the first day I met Derek my fiancé, I was in love with him.

Now two and a bit years later and 22 days before we are married I still have that passion and in love feeling I had when I first laid eyes on him.

We where nearly killed in a serious car crash last year and went through many trials and tribulations and through all of that I still wake up every morning and see the same fire of love as at the first moment we met.

I would have thought by now that the “falling in love bit” would have calmed down by now, but yet it grows stronger every day.

We live and work together and compliment each other in so many ways and both of us are honesty with each other about everything.

If the one does something the other does not like, we both make it none and that’s that.

Derek knows me so well like I he, that we read each other so well, and I mean right into the inner sanctum of each other.

Just by his presence I can tell his deepest feelings. (depressed, happy ect)

We respect each other’s views and beliefs and believe me we have many differences' and common ground that we share.

We are not scared to bare each other’s pain and agony but to embrace what is at hand and make the best of it.

My dear friends, life is too short to waste.

I have accepted HIV as part of our lives and we have not allowed it to rule our lives but to enhance it.

So, share Valentines day with me with the one that you love and live life.

Regards,

Mark

Just an update on our garden

2009-02-08T18:53:00.001+02:00

We worked for the last two days on our garden. Its important to have fresh herbs and vegetables at all times.

Derek has taught me so much about eating healthy and living with HIV for the past 20yrs has proven to eat healthy and take your meds makes the world of difference.

To all my friends out there that are HIV+, its cheap and easy to set up your own garden if you have the available ground.

But you can also grow herbs in pot containers of all sizes and have vegetables as well.

I have seen so many communities build their own hot houses or gardens which supplements those who need fresh herbs and vegetables.

I love you all and hope that my garden can be an inspiration to you all.

Love Mark

Hope

2009-02-05T21:48:00.001+02:00

Never surrender yourself to any storm that may come your way.

Use your inner strength to ride out the storm and gain wisdom and coping mechanisms so that when the storm approaches again you will know what to do.

Life is full of storms and sunny days, we have to take each situation and learn and implement a plan to overcome and be victorious.

I speak from years of experience through the wonderful journey of life which I have encountered many situations and have had to learn how to cope and overcome what comes one’s way.

In the beginning we are ignorant and as we progress and grow with wisdom we become achievers and accomplishers.

I want you to live your life to the fullest even though you may be HIV+ and some with full blown AIDS. Don’t through in the towel.

Change your lifestyle and mindset and say that I am a over comer and I will rise above it all.

There is only one you and each time you look into the mirror remember that you are a survivor.

I am always available to all if you want to email me or just chat about been HIV+ feel free to contact me either via email or the contact consoles on my blog.

My passion for life comes from within, and that is never to surrender but learn, listen and grow with wisdom.

Be humble, gentle but yet firm, don’t let anyone walk over your rights!

Please feel free to comment on my blog, you have the freedom of speech.

But, please no hate speech of any kind!

Let us stand together in solidarity against HIV+ and AIDS and make the world a better place

Love

Mark Farrell

The Rose Of Life The Journey Living With HIV

Some art I would like to share with you

2009-02-05T21:30:00.001+02:00

View Full Album

Live life to the fullest

2009-02-03T21:56:00.000+02:00

Live life to the fullest and hold what is dear to you close to your heart,

don’t waiver from your integrity and inner self, but be strong in all that you do and take every storm that comes your way with strength and become victorious in all the things that you do.

Weekly Update

2009-02-02T19:41:00.001+02:00

Well this last week has been interesting and I must learn to focus on my accounting part of my job and get things done, no matter how distracted I become as I handle, customer service, IT technical, accounts, GIS mapping and all data enq and of course I have to answer up to two calls at the same time and that does not include my mobile phone which is for after hours calls.

So I work under pressure all the time to achieve our goals at work. Its a challenge and I am constantly working on my weaknesses every day.

Last week we sent out the wedding invitations and now awaiting confirmation RSVP’S

Our honeymoon suite has been booked and all is on track for the big day.

Our passports at hand for our honeymoon which we cant afford right now and will have to save up and when we have enough money then we will go on a trip.

The future looks great for the both of us and I live life to the fullest.

To get to the point where I am now at, has taken a long time and a journey of life with all the negative and positive actions that come.

But, through all of this I have persevered and have stood firm.

I have to thank two very close friends Peter & Jerome and of course my fiancé Derek whom have stood by me through thick and thin.

I can’t emphasise the importance of getting to know your partner from the inside out before taking the step to marriage.

By the time you tie the knot you would have been through all the up’s and down’s in the relationship and be prepared to move on to marriage.

Only together can you make things work, through respect and unconditional love and understanding

Not withholding any secrets from each other but been transparent and honest.

Nothing has been easy and the road has been difficult but together through wisdom we have overcome.

My friends if we can weather the storms so can you!

HIV is not the end, you can change and make it a begging of a great journey!

I love you all and god bless

Mark Farrell

At last I have my motor car learners licence

2009-02-02T19:23:00.001+02:00

Today at 10.30am I wrote my motor car learners licence and passed! This was the second time around. I was so happy I almost cried, this may seem simple to some but it meant so much for me.

I could not fail again the last time was due to a misunderstanding and this time I was sure that I was going to pass and I did.

My goal was to have my learners licence before we got married and heh I did it. Yipee!!!!!

At last in the near future I will be a driver with a licence and I will be able to drive around and see my clients and also if something had to happen to Derek, at least I can drive.

It’s a huge mile stone for me and I am over the moon. I just had to share this with you all, its just to important not to share.

Have a great day

Anticipation

2009-02-01T18:01:00.001+02:00

What a week it has been, sending wedding invitations and awaiting RSVP’s.

I am still excited and can’t wait for the big day as it draws nearer each day.

Its the anticipation of the moment that is to come that will change my life forever in more than many ways.

The past two decades of life for me has been a struggle with so many things and now at last things are coming together

Its been worth all the trials, tribulations and all the storms that I have encountered on my journey of life.

Marriage means so much to me and the commitment that comes along with the responsibility.

To those whom have known me over the years, you can know see that no matter what I have been through I have not been victorious for myself but that the coping mechanism gained can empower those who are or may have been in a similar situations that I was once in.

Please don’t give up the fight, no matter how ill you are, life is worth the living and if you need someone to talk to or email, I am always there as my partner is too.

One day, I will publish my book, not for myself but for all those affected and infected by HIV/AIDS.

Never surrender, never say die!

Life is too precious.

I will update soon

Mark Farrell

Lupo’s Restaurant Wynberg Cape Town

2009-01-25T20:08:00.001+02:00

Well last night we went to the restaurant where we will be holding our reception and it was great. We had excellent food and the quality was outstanding.

Love has no boundaries and I feel like a youngster all over again with butterflies in my stomach and the excitement of tying the knot after two years.

We have been through so much and have had the time to get to know each other as friends and now the next step marriage.

After 44yrs I have finally found my soul mate whom I am going to spend the rest of my life with.

Been HIV+ has had its up’s and down’s but the greatest gift of wisdom I have gained is patience and unconditional love and understanding.

I can’t explain the excitement and the love that we have for each other, I have the same love (in love feeling) as the first day I looked into his eyes.

He is so passionate about life and cares for all deeply and we compliment each other so well.

As all relationships we have had our fair deal of hardship and suffering but have overcome and stood by each other.

We may not have enough money as such yet for the honeymoon but we will have to save up for that.

The greatest gift is his honesty and protective custody of my heart.

This is the greatest moment of my life and I want to share it with you.

I have already taken the step to change my surname already as you can see, so that all may become used to my new surname.

My friends, thank you so much for all your support and love.

It is possible for two HIV+ people to fall in love, live a healthy lifestyle and take care of each other in love and through all things and overcome.

Be blessed all

Mark Farrell Watling

5th of March our wedding day

2009-01-17T19:59:00.001+02:00

What:	Wedding of Mark Farrell & Derek Watling My partner and I are getting married on the 5th of March 2009
When:	Thursday, March 5, 2009 2:00 PM to 3:00 PM
Where:	Paarl Department Of Home Affairs Paarl, Western Cape South Africa

Message for today

2009-01-14T18:19:00.001+02:00

It’s been quite a journey over the last five years to where I am now. So many things have transpired and at last my soul mate has is about to become one with me.

Living with HIV has been a privilege and I have gained so much wisdom and a greater passion for life.

I have had to start more than once from scratch and rebuild my life where it was almost destroyed but before the end, I would be saved and this by the grace of God.

Now I find myself in a loving relationship and on the exciting journey of marriage and all that may come my way.

I have never allowed HIV or any of the opportunistic infections change my passion for life or quench the fire from within my inner sanctum!

My spirit is alive and well.

Even though there have been times when I have been so ill, even I doubted my own sanity to survive and just wanted to accept death as the end all, but as usual my inner soul would not allow me to do that, as I am an over comer.

Victory comes from within and only after you have been through many trials and tribulations and have gained the wisdom and copping skills can you truly be an over comer and you should in return pass those skills on to those who find themselves in similar predicaments and enhance their live so that they can empower others around them.

There is no excuse to allow HIV to take control of your soul and spirit and let the virus dictate and rule you.

You are the master of your own destiny and should live life to the fullest and be responsible and healthy

Every day no matter what storm blows your way, you must let it be and ride it out as in the end you will gain a myriad of wisdom and will enable you to live life to the fullest.

My message is simple, if I could have gone through all the trials and tribulations over the last few years and still be on top so can you.

Life is not always a pleasant journey, it’s a school and as learners we are the students of life until our last breath.

So in conclusion for today, thank the creator for all that you have and be grateful

Mark Gavin Farrell

2009 start go!

2009-01-10T10:12:00.001+02:00

Quote of the

Well congratulations on another birthday Kevin and taking us to a great restaurant and experience. I wish you all the very best for 2009!

These photo’s are just a glimpse into what has happened over the last few days into 2009.

Now the year has begun on a high note and I am working my ass off and the wedding plans for March are on the cards.

My dear friends living with HIV for over 19yrs is a privilege and it has taught me so much about life.

Don’t let HIV/AIDS take you down, you can overcome all things, through love, understanding and good health.

I will update soon

2009 Dedication to all those affected and infected by HIV/AIDS

2009-01-02T23:08:00.001+02:00

Well guys its 2009 and its a brand new year.

I have dedicated my entire life to all those affected or affected by HIV/AIDS.

My aim is to finish my autobiography at some stage and finish my other book entitled “The Rose Of Life The Journey Living With HIV”

I remain a person of integrity, honesty and principle, fighting for the rights of those who are HIV+. Sharing with them the coping mechanisms that I have acquired over the years and in return empowering each person to overcome and that they will pass these skills on.

No greater gift than love and wisdom can any man receive and give.

I am selfless in my ways and sharing these attributes with my partner is part and parcel of my daily life.

We must stand together against HIV/AIDS in South Africa and make sure that all are treated with respect and dignity.

May our marriage set an example to other HIV+ couples all over the world, be they of any sexual orientation that love and good health can overcome any obstacle.

Not any relationship is perfect and that is what makes a relationship work, that both work together in love and understanding of each other to move forward and build on all the up’s and downs to make the relationship work.

Be brave and courageous like a Lion and be as gentle as a Lamb.

Thank you for all your support in 2008 and I thank you for future support in 2009.

Another thing which I have decided is a follow up entries on this blog leading up to our marriage and after that you can see how we are doing and that it may encourage you and enhance your own life that you can learn from us and we can learn from you.

As we don’t know the answers to everything and we may learn from your wisdom which you share with us.

Once again I thank you

Mark Farrell & Derek Watling

2..3..1…Yippee its 2009!

2008-12-31T20:36:00.001+02:00

Well its soon going to be 2009 guys and I want to wish you all well and safe home after all the revelry and fun.

Please don’t drink and drive and if you do make sure that you have someone you can call to take you home safely.

The South African Police, Traffic Services and other local Police have a zero tolerance policy. So beware your car will be impounded and you will end up in jail if you drink over the limit, so please make sure that if you do, you are not going to drive.

Derek and I are staying at home and are going to enjoy the moments of going into 2009 with friends. We have made sure that they can sleep over after the party of course and that they will arrive home alive and safe, that is what true friendship is all about…….and then the clean up..heh heh

So the next time I will be doing an update it will be after 12am.

Have a wonderful 2009

Love Mark Farrell and Derek Watling

New Year Message From Myself & Derek 2009

2008-12-30T22:17:00.001+02:00

2008 has presented many challenges for myself and Derek in our relationship and every day living. We have overcome so many things this year and can only look forward to 2009.

Sadly, I lost both my step mom and then my dad a month apart from each other and Derek helped me cope with the loss.

Derek started ARV’S this year and is doing very very well. Then we moved into our new home and its made all the difference to us.

At last for the first time we have a home all to ourselves and of course my very first home in my life.

My health has just gone from strength to strength thanks to Derek.

My projects I have had to put aside as I still do not have a laptop to work on, but I am content and happy.

I am just happy that we both have work and we work very hard and will continue to do so in the coming year.

I have never forgotten my promises that I made earlier this year to continue writing my book and build new websites for those affected and infected by HIV/AIDS in Africa. But due to all the constraints of time and financial up’s and down’s I have to put things on hold.

Next year on the 5th March 2009 2pm I will change my surname from Mark Farrell to Mark Farrell Watling after the wedding and this will be the day that I will proudly bare my partners surname with pride.

I would like to dedicate 2008 to my dad who was a generous person and a good father and husband and I will try and live up to his ethics and principles of integrity, unconditional love and acceptance.

If Derek and I can survive been HIV+ and live life to the fullest then so can you whether or not you are HIV+.

We live by the principles of integrity, honesty, unconditional love and acceptance of all peoples.

Let us hold hands and hope for a peaceful 2009 where all nations stand together for all humanity in all ways.

Look into the future with joy and count your blessings that are to come. No matter all the up’s and down’s that may come your way, take them as a challenge and accept the wisdom gained to overcome and pass on those coping mechanisms to others that may pass your way that they may empower themselves to be achievers and in return pass those skills and attributes on to others.

In closing, thank you to all my friends and associates that have supported me over the years and this year.

We appreciate all that you have done and only wish the very best for all of you and if I had to draw up a list it would be pages and pages.

As a couple we are here for all those affected and infected by HIV/AIDS and will continue to do. We will try to be an example of a married gay couple and set an example to all out there, that true love and commitment is more than just a blessing.

Love your partner with all your heart and soul no matter if your gay or not. It does not matter, as love has no colour or sexual preference.

You are most welcome to email or contact me if you are struggling with living or affected by HIV/AIDS. I will gladly share my coping mechanisms with you or even come and do a presentation.

I do this with love.

Please my friends, live life to the fullest, love and respect all around you.

May God bless you all in all that you do.

Best wishes,

Mark Farrell & Derek Watling

30/12/2008

“HIV is not a death sentence but a lifestyle, only through a positive attitude will you overcome”

XMAS 2008

2008-12-26T11:07:00.001+02:00

Well its the first XMAS I have not celebrated with my family as both my dad and step mom died earlier this year.

Now, I have gained a new family and have been embraced into the fold which is great.

Next year as you know I will be getting married and a name change will take place from Mark Farrell to Mark Farrell Watling.

I will now be apart of a family again but will bare the name of my partner not forgetting my linage and roots of my father.

He would have been proud of me and would have said “Well done my son”

This year has been a difficult one for me as Derek and I have been through so many trials and tribulations but we have overcome all those things that could have hindered us.

We now have our new house and are blessed. We have opened up our hearts to others to reach out to them.

Although I have lost one part of my family, I have gained another and that is a true blessing in its own.

Living with HIV and integrating it into your lifestyle and making the very best of it is a blessing.

There is so much that I have wanted to do like finish my book that I have been writing for a few years now but have not been able to this year due to our financial constraints.

I have never given up my dream to complete my book and carry on with my vision to empower all those either affected or infected by HIV/AIDS.

To provide an open forum for discussion and sharing of themselves with each other in love. No matter if it was poetry, art or any other that may enhance the lives of themselves and all those around them.

I look forward to 2009 with hope and anticipation that all my aspirations will come to be.

Most of all we South Africans are approaching a new political era where change is about to take place.

All over the world there has been a financial crisis and companies have fallen by the way with the workers been the victims in the end, and my prayers are with them.

I assure you that in 2009 things will turn around and get better, so don't give up hope

I have survived over 18yrs of been HIV+ through many trials and tribulations amongst been very ill and against odds have survived.

Let us stand together and embrace each other in love and remember the true meaning of XMAS that a child was born and brought hope and peace to many.

May God bless you all

Mark Farrell

Official Announcement Of Our Marriage 5th Of March 2009

2008-12-20T11:23:00.001+02:00

I would like to announce our wedding date and place, we are getting married on the 5th Of March in Paarl, Western Cape, South Africa

Derek and I would like to thank all of you who have been on this journey with me over the last few years and wish to share this joy with you all!

The XMAS Spirit

2008-12-06T14:18:00.001+02:00

MERRY XMAS ALL HAVE A WONDERFUL FESTIVE SEASON AND HAPPY NEW YEAR FOR 2009

FROM DEREK AND MYSELF

A pink sunset

2008-12-06T14:11:00.001+02:00

Its been a very long month and now we are already in December and at this time we don’t have much money left at all. The lesson that I have learnt this year is patience and to persevere in all things no matter what comes ones way but to learn and overcome through the wisdom we have learnt

To all my friends from all over the world happy holidays all and may you be blessed!

Derek and I wish you all the very best for 2009.

Our home

2008-11-21T17:55:00.001+02:00

I have been asked to update and after a month we are still sorting out our home and I have added these pictures to show you just a glimpse of our humble home.

Have a great day

Greyton

2008-10-26T22:45:00.000+02:00

Finally we have all our furniture

2008-10-26T21:41:00.001+02:00

Today I can say that we finally have moved in although we have been in the house since the 18th of this month.

As you can see from the very first entry I have made on this blog things have changed so much for me.

Now a new era has started and for the first time I have a house of my own and am getting married soon to my soul mate and life partner.

Finally, I will be able to get down to those things that I have wanted to achieve for all those affected and infected by HIV/AIDS.

Start writing my book again and concentrate on projects but of course that will take time and leave is coming up and both of us need some rest and this will be only on the 19^th of December until the 4^th of January 2009.

For the first time I will have an XMAS tree and adorn our home with XMAS lights and of course the tree. At last I have a family in the context of my relationship since my father passed away been the last link in the chain and bloodline of my dad.

Now, I have to make the best of things and make him proud of me as he watches me from above.

I have never surrendered to the virus and that is why I am alive today and of course the grace of God.

I will update soon

Love Mark

Passion and perseverance

2008-10-12T10:15:00.001+02:00

Life has so many twists and turns that makes the journey so much more interesting and challenging every day!

There are many who are following our journey with living with HIV and its always encouraging to hear thank you!

I am blessed in all my ways and not just because things are on the up and up but because if it was not for all the turmoil and bad times I would not have had acquired life skills and wisdom to deal with life itself.

We have one life to live and we have to live it to the fullest and every act of random kindness brings joy to those in need.

Soon, as you all know by now, that we are moving into our house next weekend and it will take another weekend to move the rest of the stuff.

Lately though we both have been very tired when we get home and go to bed early. I think its time we had some leave and went away again for some well deserved rest.

So remember in life we have to go through all of the up’s and downs to learn and rise above it all.

I will update soon again.

Mark

An old church we saw today

2008-10-11T14:47:00.001+02:00

A glimspe into the last few months through the lense of my camera

2008-10-11T14:15:00.001+02:00

Saturday update

2008-10-04T17:41:00.001+02:00

This week has been a blessing finally I have a booking for my learners drivers licence which I have been waiting for an appointment and finally I will write the exam on the 27^th Of November 2008

It has been quite a journey this year with the passing of both my parents and working hard at work.

Now we are going to move into our first house and of course my first own home ever in my life and that is great.

I love life to the fullest and at last things are going in the right direction.

After many years of going downhill finally with the one I love things are on the mend and only getter better.

Soon I will start writing again and proceed with writing my autobiography which I have been busy with for a few years and continue to work on those HIV/AIDS projects that I have put on hold for the last few months due to things not going so well

I will update you all soon

Love

Mark

Finally our own home celebrate this occasion with us

2008-09-20T14:05:00.001+02:00

On the 1st of November this year we will be moving into our own home. I am so happy as this is what I have been waiting for all my life to have my own place. Now as a spouse we both will have our very own place. I wanted to share this with you all.

update

2008-09-10T15:56:00.001+02:00

I am so tired today, think I am coming down with the flu. Went to work and Derek brought me home, instead I have had not had once minutes peace due to all the calls I have taken at home.

Well now I have a headache from hell and am going to try and get some sleep.

Of course I am still saving up for a laptop as I soon have to be on the road and so on.

I will update later today again.

Some more pictures of Greyton

2008-09-07T09:08:00.001+02:00

Some Pictures taken at Greyton this weekend

2008-08-17T18:42:00.001+02:00

Thank you all

2008-08-15T07:26:00.001+02:00

I would like to thank all of you for sharing the last birth year with me and been such great friends.

I really appreciate all that you have done and continue to do.

Each day has been a blessing to know that you are all out there thinking of me and your prayres

I am really grateful and humbled by such an outpouring of love and affection

If we could share our love with all those arround us and bless those who are need

I am glad that you could share this day with and although I did not get a laptop today that is not important as the love that I have from my partner and all my friends that are always at my side as I am for them

Have a blessed day and celebrate life with me

Love Mark

Mark Gavin Farrell Watling

A weekend of rest and celebration

2008-08-14T21:53:00.001+02:00

Well tomorrow we leave for Greyton for the weekend to take some time out and spend quality time with my closet friends as we celebrate my birthday and our engagement.

It’s been quiet a hectic week at work and now for the first time I am going away with the people I love and my fiancé (Derek)

Derek has treated me with so much love and understanding and has gone more than the extra mile for me through the last two years and of course through the recent two months when both my parents passed away and now today his aunt passed away at the age of 92.

I enjoy every moment of the day that I spend with Derek and when he holds me and serenades me at night it’s just so unbelievable.

My life has changed so much, but I never forgot the times that I was suffering and had nothing. Now I am so happy just with the basic things in life and love has become the priority in my life

My work of course comes first since it puts food on the table but my life is devoted still to all those who are affected and infected by HIV/AIDS and that will remain my main focus of my life and to finish “The Rose Of Life The Journey Living With HIV©2000-2008”

Next year of course on Valentines Day Saturday 14^th Of February 2009 we are going to be married but of course the date could change earlier.

My thanks to all my friends who have been by my side over the last few years and have shared all the good and bad moments in my life, I salute you all!

Now the 15^th of August I am 44, geese I am getting so old (ha ha) but I love life to the fullest

May you all have a blessed day

Love Mark

The joys of life - photo's - 10 August 2008

2008-08-10T19:16:00.001+02:00

2008-08-09T07:47:00.001+02:00

Well it’s been some time since the passing of my dad and step mom and of course the time of healing must take place now.

I am still having problems with the bank who are the executors of the will as they now want to send all the papers back to me as they can’t make enough money out of the will which sickens me.

So all the funds of both will properly be deposited into my account and I will have to appoint a lawyer to create a trust fund and payments to the debtors will be made from that fund to try and cover their debts and will have to sell his car to pay debts as well.

This is really sad as I thought the bank would be able to sort all these things out

Next week Derek and I have decided to go away for my birthday and celebrate our engagement as this is when he wanted to ask me to marry him. So the celebration will be two fold.

I still can’t afford a laptop at the moment in life and I know that it will bring so much proactive positive energy into my life as I could continue to work on my projects which I have placed on hold for such a long time.

I have checked with the credit bureau and because one outstanding account some years ago I cant have credit.

I have been blessed in the work that I am doing and I work long hours and am rewarded just by the reaction I get from the boss, clients no matter if it is negative or positive.

Soon I pray we will have our house. (rented of course) For the first time in my life I will be in a stable relationship and security over my head thanks to Derek my fiancé and all my hard work

Please guys don’t think for one moment I have forgotten the projects, I have not at any stage. Its that if I had the tools like a laptop I could always work offline where ever I was and be more productive even though I have such a busy schedule.

One thing that we have decided is to take more time off over the weekends and spend it on ourselves as almost every weekend thus far has been very busy either with work or other things but not for ourselves.

Believe in yourself guys and live life to the fullest. No matter what comes your way, hold your head up high and say “I can do all things and accomplish all”

I will update soon again.

Thank you for all your support.

Please note that I am online on my mobile phone – Skype, MSN, Yahoo, ICQ and so on.

Mark Farrell

Tel: 27 76 280 2833

0762802833

021 689 4021/ 27 21 689 4021

Skype: posboy1

Update soon

2008-08-08T07:34:00.001+02:00

Hi guys,

I will update soon as I have so much to tell you

Love

Mark

Mark Farrell

Tel: 27 76 280 2833

0762802833

021 689 4021/ 27 21 689 4021

Skype: posboy1

Life is so special

2008-07-28T21:34:00.001+02:00

Life is so special and along the highway of trials and tribulations we find solace and peace.

Its through the kaleidoscope of personalities that we come across that shape our lives

The wisdom we gain by listening and be willing to learn

To grasp onto wisdom and walk the path of life with our heads help up high

Not to hold malice against anyone

Rejoice in life with all your heart and soul and remember your loved ones

Hold onto what you value most

Mark Farrell

Final Good Bye to my dad's home

2008-07-27T22:25:00.001+02:00

Today I finished up at my dad's home and locked the door for the last time and it was quite emotional two days for me.

Been the sole heir has brought on so many problems with my twin step brother and sister and other step brother its just to traumatic to explain.

In fairness to the family with the responsibility and trust bestowed upon me by my dad it has not been easy.

My step brother just walked in and demanded a wheel chair from me and took it no matter that it was part of the estate. I gave them almost everything and even though they where left out of the will they still gave me uphill and where drunk and that hurt me as I have given them so much, even though all was left to me.

Even packing the boxes for them which they did not even help me with over the last few weeks, only demanding things, I still gave them what they wanted.

All the furniture however I have handed over to the estate and I will not be handing over to them as this was not my dad's and step mom's wish as laid down in the will.

The greed of this ramble of family constantly on the bottle of booze and so, did not even help with the house. Over the years they borrowed money from my dad and it came to such a point that my dad lost it with them and said no more.

He paid thousands of rand's towards hospital bills for himself and his wife whom he was dedicated to as she was to him.

They made sure that I would make the right decisions with their estate and carry out their wishes to the end.

This coming week the furniture go's into storage until the estate is tied up and then when my partner and I find a house we will move it there.

There is no greater gift than love.

I will update soon again

Engaged to marry

2008-07-06T22:28:00.001+02:00

At 5.47pm today I was asked by Derek to marry him and of course I said yes. I thought I'd share this with you all

Eulogy For My Dad And Mom

2008-06-29T21:36:00.001+02:00

We are gathered here to today to celebrate the life of Derek Farrell, husband, father, uncle, grandfather and friend to many.

My father always taught me to love life to the fullest and be humane and humble to all. It’s better to give than receive. His integrity and devotion as a husband was unquestionable. His love for Joan was like a fairy tale. The depth of their total commitment to each other through sickness and health should be the building stone of any foundation in life. Their courage to uplift each other and enhance all that they had, their love, children, grandchildren and friends.

As a father even when as a child we where separated he stood up for me and imparted wisdom and knowledge that will remain with me for all eternity.

He always gave of himself and never expected anything in return, always going the extra mile for everyone. There is not a moment in time that I can remember that he has ever said no to those in need, even if it meant he had to sacrifice something himself.

To us all both dad and Joan have brought so much joy and happiness, teaching us the true value of unconditional love and the sanctity of marriage and no matter what storm comes your way, you can overcome all through love.

My praise to Joan is that she was like Joan de Arc a warrior in her own rights; she was very brave right until the end and was concerned about daddy and what would happen to him. Such love and dedication even in the final moments should be a lesson to us all.

Dad been very ill all these months always said he was ok and kept his illness away from most of us, to protect his beloved and make sure that she knew that she was loved and that he would be there for her to the end.

Dad did not like to admit or let on that he was ill, he was a man who took pride in his life and most of all his wife.

His wish was to be with Joan and now together they shall be for all eternity, its only fitting that these two are laid to rest together as we celebrate not just dad but mom too.

United we stand as a family today bonded by the love of our parents who have set an example that we should all follow.

I would like to thank Roy and Sandra for been more than friends and neighbours but family to both my dad and Joan over the years. Such unconditional love and deep spiritual bonds you had with Derek and Joan will be with us all for all eternity. As such I embrace you as family, for your friendship has gone far beyond friendship.

Herman has been a pillar in this time and I am glad that he is part of my family. For he and Talana I thank for the many hours they spent at the hospital and words of encouragement.

My partner Derek has stood by my side through all of this from the 1^st day we brought dad into hospital without question. He has been wonderful and supportive and I thank him for been there with me in the last moments of dad’s life.

To the rest of my family, let us stand united today in love and celebrate our parents lives with dignity and unconditional love.

The funeral will take place on Friday the 4th Of July at 2pm.

Its been a difficult week and of course this week that is to come to tie up all the loose ends with his estate.

Today though I have been sleeping again due to an infection that has reared its ugly head again and I think its due to all the stress of the past month and running around trying to tie up the estate and funeral arrangements.

I am so happy that I have gained a new family during all of this as we where not that close and now we have become even closer and they now know me for whom I am and see that I truly have my fathers nature of goodwill to all mankind and integrity

I will endeavour to carry on dad's legacy and principles.

I will update you all again

Love Mark

Please don't let life or a death of a loved one take you off the path of life, we should celebrate their lives and live a healthy life and remember their examples that they have set.

Update

2008-06-25T17:00:00.000+02:00

Tomorrow I will be running around trying to sort out the funeral arrangements and funeral policies including the executor of the will which is ABSA Trust and work from there. I am happy thus far that everything has been pre organised by my dad that all his papers are in order and so on.

He put everything in place, he did not complete his wife’s estate which I will also do tomorrow and all in all they can now both rest in peace and I will follow out the instructions as laid down in the will to the letter.

A family must stand united and not let greed and envy rule their minds and ego’s.

Mark Farrell

Tel: 27 76 280 2833

0762802833

021 689 4021/ 27 21 689 4021

Skype: posboy1

Hi guys

2008-06-25T16:34:00.000+02:00

Hi guys,

I will be quiet for a day or two sorted out my parents estates which of course takes up too 6 months to complete. I am just very tired and will let you all know shortly what has transpired,

Regards,

Mark Farrell

Tel: 27 76 280 2833

0762802833

021 689 4021/ 27 21 689 4021

Skype: posboy1

My father passed away on the 23rd of June 2005

2008-06-25T09:54:00.001+02:00

After a long battle of 31days in ICU my dad finally found peace and passed away. The doctor called me on Monday to inform me that he has been in a coma for over a week and that all his organs where failing at a rapid rate and that death was imminent.

I sat with my dad and told him how much I loved him and that I would miss him but that he would soon be with his wife and that they would be together again.

At his death bed I was sad and thanks to my partner who kept me stable during this all, I watched my dad slip away and pass away.

Now I have to make all the funeral arrangements and content with the rest of the family whom are upset at the will status which has left me with everything as the only surviving son.

Its just so unpleasant to have to contend with bickering step brothers and sisters who think they are going to loose out.

My dad was so organised that he had left instructions to the letter before I took him to hospital on what was to be done after his death.

This was his wish and as his son I will carry all his wishes out to the letter no matter what the rest of the family bickers about his estate.

My dad new before hand about the problems that might occur after his death and made dam sure that all was in order and that the right things would be done.

He passed away a month after his wife's funeral to the hour we had taken him to hospital. Strange but this is how it happened.

I loved my father and have made sure that both his ashes and his wife's are scattered together as I have never seen two people so in love for over 18yrs.

We are supposed to stand together as a family but in this case it seems that some members of the family just are greedy or just plain difficult.

Emotions are running high at this moment and over a couple of days things should calm down.

Then I can bring the family together and try and establish unity as a family should be united at all times, not bickering over stupid things.

Mark

A spiritual message

2008-06-12T09:47:00.001+02:00

Glory to God and his son. He has brought me such strength in these last weeks of great anguish and pain. Psalm’s has comforted and blessed me.

There is no hole to deep or mountain to high to overcome through the wisdom, compassion that God has empowered us.

We have to reach deep within our soul and realise that God is good all the time and that we should have a song of praise all the time, no matter how bad or good things may be.

This has been a journey of soul searching for me to place my self at the altar of God and his mercy.

I have come a long way from been his servant and serving a congregation to the current situation that I am now in.

From birth been the only surviving sibling and walking the long wonderful journey of life through many, may trials and tribulations. Always wondering why I left his service by my own choice.

Since I have been part of the secular world I have gained so much and my spirit has matured to a higher level and I have been used in so many more powerful ways than when I was in His service.

His greater plan always takes precedent. Through the many years I have gained so much insight into the many tribulations and plights of others and gained so much wisdom that I am enabled to empower others who are in the same situation as others and I where in.

Its such a blessing to have such a rare gift to be able to see into peoples hearts and share the love of God and embrace them in their darkest hour and hold their heart in our hand and bring them out into the light.

There is not one moment that goes’s by that I am not thinking of my dad who is not doing too well at all and I am constantly praying for him.

My father brought me up with the principles of greatness, integrity, compassion, truth, honesty and above all the love of God.

This is the fist time that I am been so open about my true spiritual side.

“I live not for myself but for all those affected or infected by HIV/AIDS”

As my father’s son, I will endeavour to carry on his good nature and he is proud of my accomplishments as a humanitarian and a compassionate person.

Though I am not well and I am still recovering my vision has not died but has just gone into hibernation for the time being.

Everything comes to be over time. I have promised to work on the data base but due to some many things that have taken place I have not been able to do so.

I still do not have the funds for a laptop and you know what guys, I leave it all up to His counsel and love that this will come to pass.

In the quietness at night tears flow down my eyes as currently I have problems with my lungs and breathing and I get out of bed that I can let Derek sleep so that he can go to work refreshed. But, he is so loving and caring and embraces me with his heart and soul; he is truly my soul mate.

Soon, I will be back at work and productive. But, friends please do not think for one moment that I have forgotten you by replying late to emails, it’s due to the current situation and attention that I have given to family as a priority.

We tend to forget our family which comes first. Although I am gay I do have a family besides Derek and his family I have an extended family of step brothers and sister, whom I love and care for.

It’s with the same zeal, compassion, dedication to HIV/AIDS I share with my family and in this time of need where they have lost their mother and now there step dad is very ill. This is the time that family stand together as one.

We have a limited time on earth, let us serve the King/creator to the best of our capabilities and not condemn others of faith, but embrace them and share the love of the creator together.

By binding and bond love and sharing compassion to all those out their in need. Be selfless in your ways and perform a random act of kindness.

Please don’t let the troubled waters of life get to you, no matter if you seem you are drowning, there is always a helping hand out there even when you least expect it.

Your life is far more important and you have only this once to travel the journey of life and live it to the fullest. One day, I will accomplish writing my book “The Rose Of Life The Journey Living With HIV”

I know that it will be a blessing to all and I am sure that their will be many more once I have published it, but for now dear friends, I wait for that open door.

Tired as what I may be today, I have found the strength to get up and write for you and share some moments in my life again. The picture of the card is from Derek which he gave to me. Rare is such love we find today no matter what sexual orientation we come from.

It’s the quality of love that we share with our partners that makes a relationship.

I love you all.

Love Mark

Update

2008-06-11T08:56:00.001+02:00

Yesterday I received a call at 6.30am to inform me that my dad was not doing well and that is was on a ventilator and that every three days he was on the kidney machine.

Its really sad as Saturday he was smiling and joking but yet once again he has slipped into illness and to my surprise he was on morphine for the last few days.

The nurses have always been upfront and honest but they omitted to inform me about the morphine.

As I have been a care worker with HIV/AIDS patients and the last patient I was attending was one of my friends partners who passed away after a long battle with cancer. So I am quite aware of the use of morphine.

I have been told that dad is in a stable but very serious situation and last night I could not sleep, compounded by the flu that I have.

But, I have such a wonderful partner who supports me through the good and bad times.

Please keep the faith guys.

Mark

Down with flu

2008-06-09T23:26:00.001+02:00

As you can see I have not been updating my blog like I used to. After my step-mothers passing and rushing my dad to ICU its been chaotic.

But on Sunday I was told that dad is now talking and that is great. I have had the flu for over a week now and I had to go to my doctor today as the body could not cope anymore.

Earlier last week my CD4 results where 435 and my viral load was undetectable and that is great.

Its just this flu that has disabled me some what. A winter inconvenience

Due to the heavy work load and immune system been at a low due to all the stress of the last month, it has opened the doors to flu.

My head is spinning and I hope I am making sense.

Please don't let life get you down, persist in all that you do.

Love Mark

My dad is still in ICU

2008-06-01T11:32:00.001+02:00

My dear friends I saw my dad yesterday after not seeing him for three days to too me been so emotionally tired and calling the hospital every day about three times a day for progress.

I was in shock as he was on a kidney machine and respirator due to the pancreas infection and other underlying factors. He just kept staring into the lights.

It was scary and all the family was there and we take turns in seeing him and bringing him love and encouragement.

I had to hold back to tears and Derek held my and my dad's hand and that is what we all needed a united front of support for my dad.

I spoke to my brother in law and we have become close over the last week or so due to him loosing his mother and now a close shave with death with my dad.

The emotional highlight of yesterday is that the family said he was not speaking but as the last one there with Derek he spoke briefly to us, clear and audible before going into a status again.

I said to him that I love him very much and that I want him to know that and he must pull through and he replied that he knew that I loved him and passed out.

Just those words made me want to cry that he knew that as his son I was doing all that I could for him.

My life in the last three weeks has been thrown into so much emotionally turmoil, if it was not from the support my partner gave me and the way he has stood by me, I would have crashed by now.

I pray for my dad's recovery every day and that he will be able to live a some what normal live a normal life again, been realistic too even though he does come out of hospital he will still have to have care.

My tribute today is to my dad been a good father and husband.

May he live a long and prosperous life.

Mark

At last major update

2008-05-25T09:28:00.001+02:00

It’s the Sunday, 25 May 2008 and its 08:57:41 AM. It’s really been such along time since I have done an update due to many circumstances and my head is still reeling from all the events still transpiring at this current time.

My step mom passed away last Saturday at 3.30pm after a long battle with an infection that she had. She suffered much pain and agony for many months but finally organ failure took place as the infection had spread to other major organs.

This was a tremendous blow to my dad as his soul mate had died and at 77 he was not well himself. Joan (step mom) always put family first and of course her husband, no matter what the cost of pain she was in. I admired her for her courage and choice of a quality life and death with dignity.

My dad has taken the loss very bad and had to be rushed to hospital on Friday afternoon before the funeral and that has saved his life. He is a chronic diabetic and they discovered that he had pancreatitis and some other complications. I and my partner were at this side until he was admitted with other family members.

I left work late and was advised that he was very ill but when I arrived and saw how much pain he was in I was in shock. I could not have another death on my hands.

I have lost my partner a few years ago, now my step mom and this could have been my dad. There are so many decisions to be made about my dad’s health as he needs 24/7 care at the moment. But he is stubborn and loves his independence and we will have to see if we can afford a care giver who can look after him. At this stage I am not financially able to pay for high care for him.

I am in such a rut and forget my house keys at work in the rush to get to my dad. When I found out that I had misplaced my keys, all horror scenarios went through my head, thinking that I had left them in the gate and we had been robbed and so on.

But finally yesterday my boss told me that I had left them at work could I calm down.

My blood line ends with myself as there is no other heir as I am the last surviving son after my mom (birth) brothers and sisters died many years ago, so it’s just my dad and myself.

My partner has been supportive and my dad loves him very much and I could see the joy in his face yesterday when he saw me and Derek.

I have had to change my priorities now and due to his health have to prepare to sit down with him and other family members and work out a programme for him and his future.

As his only son it’s my responsibility to see to him as he has been an outstanding father to me over the many years.

He could not even attend his own (dad) wife’s funeral as he was so weak and that is really sad. Thank goodness a video was taken and he will be able to see it at a later stage.

Besides all of this I have had to cope with been ill myself and I know that my CD4 count is going to take a knock but that is just part of life.

But when you have an amazing support system to take you through all of this, all seems ok.

It’s back to work tomorrow and I hope I can focus on what I am doing as I am still worried about my dad’s health and to insure that he recovers and lives a long life full of love and is surrounded by his friends.

I am so tired from all the emotions and that is taking a toll on me. I am so upset about not been around all the time for my dad but that is due to work issues and on Thursday I was made aware of his condition and did not take off work or was at this side, even though the boss new of the situation. On Friday he assumed that my partner would come back to work after he had dropped me off, but my dad was so weak that Derek had to help me take him to the toilet and so on.

We should not take chances if there is an emergency we should just take off work and the boss should be understanding enough to accept that you are partners and that support is needed.

But any case that is water under the bridge and I will update later on again

Love Mark

My apologies for such a wait for an entry from me

2008-05-18T10:41:00.001+02:00

Its been along time since I have done an update due to many things that have transpired over the last two weeks or so.

Yesterday my step mother passed at away at 3.30pm in hospital after been in 6 months of pain and agony due to infections of previous condition. She is at peace now as the last two days she was given morphine before going into a coma on Friday afternoon.

My partner was ill for over a week with a throat infection. I myself have not been well and only from this morning am I feeling well.

Every day when I arrive home, I just go straight to bed and sleep and Derek has to wake me up to eat. I hardly eat at work or anything in the day.

But, because of my physic side my step mom's condition has affected me as I was close to her. She was a very strong women who had her leg amputated and hips replaced 6 times since 1981.

She supported me when I told the family that I was HIV+ and we built up a unique friendship and understanding of pain and suffering. She withstood many years of pain and all she wanted was her dignity and in the end she died with dignity and all those that loved her around her bed.

At the moment I am struggling due to all the financial stress.

I still have not sold my paintings and will have to try some other way to sell them to survive financially.

I will update shortly again. Its now family time and I have to support my dad in his time of need, as his need comes first now not mine.

Remember that life is wonderful with all the up's and down's.

Live life to the fullest

Mark

Sunday Update

2008-04-27T19:11:00.001+02:00

Hi there guys, just the usual Sunday update. As you can see I have re posted my paintings for sale at a reduced price and I know its way below the value, but due to circumstance's I have had to make this decision

Its been a stressful day as both our old computers gave in the ghost. After many hours we seem to have sorted out the problem. I am a little relieved at this prospect. But as I have said I have to postpone projects due to lack of resources (computer wise) and will have to save as I do not solicit funds but rather fund myself via my personal savings.

Having survived 18yrs of been HIV+ gives me the passion to empower all those affected or infected by HIV/AIDS in South Africa. Designing a surplus data base and website takes alot of time and that is why I need to upgrade our current computer and buy a laptop so that I can always be available and send progress reports on a daily basis.

Always remember that you can survive HIV as I have by living life to the fullest and making sure that you are in good health.

The only gift I can give to you all, is my story of success and the zest for life in sharing and empowering all those that I meet and talk to you.

May you have a blessed day.

Love Mark

--
Mark Farrell "The Rose Of Life"
Mobile 27 76 280 2833
Living just not for myself but for all those affected and infected by the HIV/AIDS pandemic
Building a better future of communication
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Paintings For Sale Repost R5000 for all paintings

2008-04-27T10:55:00.000+02:00

These are some of the paintings I have placed for sale. If you have further queries please contact me.

This week in review

2008-04-26T08:58:00.001+02:00

Its a cloudy cool day today and the rest period has begun for myself and partner. Life second by second is so special.

No matter what has transpired over the last week, I have not lost focus on my vision and projects.

This upcoming week is going to be interesting and will give me time to publish some poems, philosophy and a few other notations that I have made over the years.

I am going to advertise my paintings again for sale and those who are visiting the photo's are on the left hand side slide show.

Later today I will update with news from South Africa and the Southern African Region and my personal views.

Life life to the fullest no matter what may come your way.

Please email me if you would like to comment or just communicate with me.

markgavinfarrell@gmail.com

Friday Morning update 07H24 am

2008-04-25T07:35:00.002+02:00

Well this week has been stressful and highly emotional both at work and at home.

My projects on still on hold at this current financial climate with strikes looming and violence on our doorstop by the nation due to the high prices which has affected the world.

Things look really bleak. Zimbabwe on a daily basis smuggling out videos and photo's of torture and violence while the South African government looks on.

Its all so sad. Have we lost our humanity? Are we all going mad, knowing that you have a dictator and things may turn out like Rwanda.

But, I have to concern myself with the peoples of my own nation who are suffering from HIV/AIDS and those who don't even have the basic rights to water, housing and electricity for many years.

Daily we have thousands of people dying in Africa and in South Africa on daily basis someone dies of AIDS related illness.

The foremost responsibility is to your nation, to uphold the constitution, protect, serve and provide a service to the peoples of South Africa!

Its not easy been a small fry in this war against injustice and HIV/AIDS, poverty and human rights.

Although I have dedicated my life to this cause, its not always easy to keep up with the financial stress of not been able to survive or even buy a computer or laptop.

I have learnt you have to rely on yourself and not on others in life, (taken into context of course) as many have promised to help me but have not. Have demanded time from me and resources and promised many things but have not delivered.

None of these things have made a negative impact on my personal vision.

So guys, well its off to work for me and then a week long holiday thanks to our government.

Please pray for me and my country and the Southern African region.

Once again you are most welcome to email me or sign my guest book.

I am open to critism and welcome any comments you may have.

Been transparent has always been my goal.

Thank you for reading my blog

Mark Farrell

Stand your ground and stand firm

2008-04-25T07:10:00.001+02:00

No matter what happens due to circumstances out of our control and other negative actions brought on by others through their own vindictive actions, don't let your inner self surrender to depression and demise!

You might feel that the dragon has spewed out lava and the demons of hell surround you.

Thrown out to the Lions and the jeers of the crowds who wish your demise

Been ripped apart by emotions of guilt and remorse due to the unrightcheous ideologies of your accusers.

But yet, they themselves stay in glass houses with glass shattered and the fragments of other lives that have transgressed.

Feeding on the weakness of others and denying the Holocaust and facts of history.

Declaring themselves the saviours and Spanish Inquisition of this millennium.

But.....justice will prevail as in the past of history. No matter how long, their injustices and malignant passions will be exposed and they will face the full wrath of the world and this nation.

We shall endeavour to protect you with all our heart and soul and in the end you will be vindicated.

Remember, that you do have the strength to face all conditions that Christ gives you.

I will gladly lay down my life for you in this quest of saving your dignity and uphold your integrity.

"You shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free"

Many shall abandon you in this troubled time as they fear the unknown, for they do not have God in their lives.

Man should not fear the unknown, but thank Him for anything that might come his way, pick up the pieces, reconcile and be a stronger person.

Empowered with wisdom, integrity, love and the knowledge of unconditional support and love through friendship.

Dear friends, at this time as stated in my last post an incident has transpired to one of my ex work colleagues and she is going through a very very difficult time and we her friends, will stand by her side no matter what transpires.

To many of us, run at the sight of adverse problems brought on by others that infringe our dignity and integrity. We are not like that and will surety in our heart we stand by our friends, no matter what the rest of the world thinks.

Remember that when you least expect it, an army shall rise from the ashes from the silence of the night, they shall encamp you and protect you from the enemy.

Hold you head high and be strong, knowing that you have support from all corners of the earth.

This dedication is for Karin my friend......................

Mark Farrell

Please keep my in your prayers

2008-04-24T19:54:00.001+02:00

Dear friends, please keep me in your daily prayers as we go through a tough time, but I know we shall overcome in the end.

These last few days have been high stress related and has taken a physical and mental toll on myself and partner.

One request is that when you pray us, ask that He takes care of us and all the peoples that are either affected or infected by HIV/AIDS in Africa.

The Lord knows my needs and been selfless in my ways, my wants do not come before those who are suffering from HIV/AIDS who have nothing and are cold in the winter or do not have food.

That He will open the doors to enable me to continue to work which he has laid out for me to accomplish.

There is no greater gift than wisdom and compassion.

Thank you my friends, and always remember you are welcome to email me, I am at your service.

Live life to the fullest

Mark Farrell

Dedication to Karin our friend in need

2008-04-24T19:34:00.001+02:00

This is an affirmation of dedication of friendship for our friend Karin whom I used to work with us.

No matter what transpires or the adversary that might come your way, we will stand by you and your integrity.

We have always believed in you and your kindness, honesty and unconditional love towards others.

No matter what mire or quick sand you may be in, you shall not be alone and we shall be there with outstretched hands towards you.

For utmost you are our friend and we value every second spent with you.

What ever troubles come in the future we will prevail the storms and hold you high, for you are our friend.

This is dedicated to Karin whom is going through a very tough time.

Love Mark….and partner

Wednesday's update

2008-04-23T22:30:00.001+02:00

Autumn is here and you can see the change in nature all around you. Life has all four seasons too and no matter what season you may be in, life is still beautiful.

Currently I am facing challenges on all fronts and I accept it as part of the schooling of life.

Once you have passed a test with flying colours you can then pass on those coping mechanisms to others who may be in the same situation as you where.

We are all overcomers and we should be inspired by our inner selves and the flame of passion for success and life.

No matter how dark and stormy the weather may be, there is always someone out there that will keep you warm in the days of winter and give you water in the days of drought of summer.

May you all of a blessed day and empower all those around you with compassion and love.

Hi guys, exhausted and tired

2008-04-22T19:27:00.001+02:00

Well I have arrived home tonight and we are buggered. The stress factor amongst other things is taking its toll. My face is starting to go numb once again as it once did when I had the angina some time ago and its quite scary.

My finger tips are going numb and I have constant discomfort on the left hand side of my face. This is delayed stress from Friday but, I believe that this will all pass when this coming week we both will be able to rest for a while, although I will be taking calls for Tuesday and Wednesday at home, but at least I will be at home.

My prayer is that someone will sponsor me a laptop so that I can continue my projects but now I am feeling down and tired and I believe that you will understand why by the previous early entries.

I am just to exhausted to even try and write to companies and present them my projects which have received approval but no assistance to fulfil them.

But, I will never surrender my dream and the hope of Africa. No matter how bad things may seem and the negative health impact I am experiencing, will never waiver me from my mission in life.

Thank you to all of those who have provided emotional support. Please remember to perform your random act of kindness to all those around you.

My heart go's out to all of you and may you all be blessed.

To all my HIV+ friends, hold on to what is precious and although I am going through a trying period, remember, I have always said that you can overcome all and you will see that I will.

Live life to the fullest

2008-04-21T23:57:00.001+02:00

Monday, 21 April 2008 11:25:20 PM

Well since last Friday we all have been under a lot physical and emotional stress and at this time can’t reveal much of what has transpired to cause us all this lot of pain.

My partner is in agony again as I just woke up and this is due to all of the above. He is in so much muscle pain all over his body and his screams woke me up. I have just given him medication and I really do think he needs to start ARV therapy ASAP!

Due to my many years of been HIV+ and symptoms, I am aware that this is not good for his immune status. This is all very scary and disconcerting to see him in this way after recovering from the last incident of pain. It always starts with stress but he keeps on going and puts on this brave face although he is not well.

Been through all of these symptoms and have shown the braveness but one has to listen to your body and rest. He and I need to take a break from work and just rest and that will only happen from this coming Sunday. I just hope this cloud that is hanging over us will clear up so that we can all move on with out lives.

I am humbled by all the challenges that come our way and this current one is a very difficult one with adverse affects to our personal health. My concern is for my dear friend who has gone through more than us, as it has affected her on a very personal level and I think of her each day and pray that God will bless her and hold her by the hand.

There is so much to tell my friends but due to certain laws I can’t reveal too much at this time, but I can assure you that the truth always prevails and it will set you free and justice will prevail in the end.

So remember no matter what may come your way, stand up for truth and your dignity. At this time I can only comment on the emotional side and not on the incident until such time as I am free to do so.

My message is there is always hope in truth and friends should stick together through what may seem the darkest hour and lead each other into the light.

Once again all projects are on hold and due to the changing financial climate here in South Africa we are all suffering financial strain from the poorest to the middle class income earners with the high inflation and food costs.

One can hardly afford the basics anymore. What is happening to South Africa? Will all the denial’s from our governments side about the crisis that is about to unfold in our region, I really don’t know.

But, still I don’t give up and will always be there for all those affected and infected by HIV/AIDS to my dying breath. At this time there is not much I can do except through this blog of mine. Been not able to buy myself a lap top (my personal savings) has really upset me, but once again I have to thank God for my life and that I have a roof over my head and a loving partner.

My fear is that my partner and I will have to leave this country one day as we would not survive if we had to stay. I in return would have to work from foreign soil to continue my work and further his and my career so that we can help those in our own country.

But, that remains to be seen…….

We have civil war about to break out in Zimbabwe and it concerns me that it will no doubt affect our own country with the influx of hungry scared refugees on an over burdened South African society.

‘I wish someone would do something about Mugabe before genocide takes place in Zimbabwe and blood flows in the streets of the innocents!”

By our own governments silence its just dam right silly to watch people been detained and massacred by the ruling party of Zimbabwe! Many say well you live in Africa, I say well there is still humanity in Africa!

As a white South African and in the minority, I am still South African and proud of it.

We need to stand together is this time of crisis and stand up and make a stand for all human rights for all the people’s of Africa!

Well that is all for today guys I am really tired please if you wish to contact me email me – markgavinfarrell@gmail.com

Love and peace

Mark Farrell

If I was gay

2008-04-19T09:05:00.001+02:00

Gay Marraige - The funny side but truthful

2008-04-19T09:02:00.001+02:00

Gay Marraiges

Arm Shipment For Zimbabwe

2008-04-18T23:33:00.001+02:00

South African dockers are refusing to unload a Chinese cargo ship carrying 77 tonnes of small arms destined for Zimbabwe.

The arms, including three million rounds of ammunition suitable for AK47s and 1,500 rocket-propelled grenades, were ordered by the Zimbabwean military at the time of the March 29 election – which Britain and other Western powers have accused Robert Mugabe of trying to rig.

The arms arrived at Durban, South Africa, on Wednesday aboard the Chinese-owned An Yue Jiang and must be taken by road to landlocked Zimbabwe, where the Government has been accused of arming rural militias before a possible run-off vote for the presidency. The opposition Movement for Democratic Change (MDC) has even accused Mr Mugabe's Zanu (PF) of preparing for a "war" against the people.

January Masilela, the South African Defence Secretary, said yesterday that the shipment had been approved this week by the National Conventional Arms Control Committee (NCACC), which he chairs. "This is a normal transaction between two sovereign states and we don't have to interfere," he said.

But opposition parties slammed the decision to grant the transit permit and the country's main transport union said that its members would refuse to unload the cargo.

“We do not believe it will be in the interest of the Zimbabwean people in general if South Africa is seen to be a conduit of arms and ammunition into Zimbabwe at a time when the situation could be described as quite volatile,” said Randall Howard, a spokesman for the South African Transport and Allied Workers Union (SATAWU

“As far as we are concerned the containers will not be offloaded”.

Rafeek Shah, defence spokesman for the Democratic Alliance, the main South African opposition party, added: "The world's astonishment at President Mbeki's political defence of Robert Mugabe will likely turn into outright anger as we are now not only denying the existence of a crisis in Zimbabwe, but also actively facilitating the arming of an increasingly despotic and desperate regime."

AfriForum, a regional business lobby group, has said that it would organise protests along the shipment's route. The South African Institute of Race Relations said that if the shipment goes ahead, "South Africa's culpability in the Zimbabwe crisis would then be without question."

Meanwhile, the South African Government's decision to allow transit of the shipment was the subject of an urgent legal challenge at the Durban High Court.

Nicole Fritz, head of the Southern African Litigation Centre, told Times Online that under the 2002 National Convention on Arms Control, which the NCACC monitors, the permit should not have been granted. That law, she said, specifically prohibits the shipment of arms that will "contribute to internal repression".

In addition, allowing the arms shipment would violate South Africa's international commitments under a range of agreements including the 1996 Wassenaar Arrangement.

"This is a very clear example of a situation in which the committee will be obliged to review a permit," she said, predicting that the High Court would order a stay on the shipment.

There have been persistent reports about Chinese arms sales to Zimbabwe, although the details are hard to pin down.

Zimbabwe announced in 2006 that it had bought six fighter jets from China, adding to a fleet of six it bought the previous year in a deal believed to be based on barter – with China obtaining precious mineral raw materials needed in its economic boom.

Zimbabwean officials said that the aircraft deal also included the purchase of 100 military vehicles from China to replace existing items that were no longer operational since Western sanctions halted imports of spare parts and maintenance equipment.

China’s sales of military hardware are believed to have amounted to more than US$200 million in recent years. There have also been reports that the Chinese have sold water cannons and mobile phone bugging equipment to the security forces in Harare – although it is not clear whether or not those sales were instigated by companies operating outside the control of central government.

Mr Howard, the SATAWU spokesman, said that the An Jue Yiang was carrying 36 containers, 30 of which were equipment for the mining industry in South Africa and Botswana.

“The balance is earmarked for Zimbabwe, four of which have arms and ammunition in them and the other two military aircraft ejector seats," he said.

Its really bizarre that the peoples of South Africa have to stand up and refuse to have the shipment of arms sent to Zimbabwe and our own government (South African) makes statements "there is no crisis" and that there is no embargo.

My question is Mr.President if these arms kill and the arms spill over into our country and kill people, who is responsible. Not only that we could have another genocide in Zimbabwe by Mugabe!

Then Mr.President you are just as responsible for all the death and mayhem if such an incident should occur and both should be charged by the Hague for murder. (International Tribunal For War Crimes Against Humanity)

So before this can happen seize the arms and destroy them.

This is just my personal view.......

Save Africa !

Peace and tranquility

2008-04-18T23:20:00.001+02:00

Sometimes we city dwellers forget the tranquility and peace that nature brings us. We need to take some time out for ourselves and rediscover our inner being. Redirect and focus on the future and listen to what our inner soul is telling us. Enhance our lives through constant renewal of our goals in life.

No matter what ill may befall one, one can overcome all, through perseverance and beliefs in ones self capabilities.

In my life I have implemented that ideology and mindset and have overcome many obstacles that have come my way and so can you.

You have to embrace life

2008-04-18T21:16:00.001+02:00

I want to tell you a parable about a bond of friendship that stood an onslaught and strengthened this band of friends. One day a friend at work stood accused of a crime from a previous employer which was not true. An army of police turned up and took her computer and laptop and searched her house

But her friends stood by her through thick and thin and embraced her with love and commitment to see her through the troubled time. As they all knew and had the facts that she was innocent and this person who accused her was nothing but a vindictive crazed beast bent on destruction of an innocent person. Unknown to them they opened the door to truth about their own secrete activities soon to be exposed and their own demise.

But through all of this her friends remained by her side no matter what time of day they where at her call. Such my friends are quality friendship when friends stand up for each other in the time of need and offer themselves in love and compassion.

In the end she was victorious as truth always prevails.

The lesson is, no matter what comes your way as a friend you should stand your moral ground and defend the honour of your friend and when the time arises that his/her integrity is breached you will stand and defend.

Let us stand together and live life to the fullest and live up to our promises of friendship to all our friends

Mark Farrell

Oil is at $112!

2008-04-17T07:26:00.001+02:00

It just seems in South Africa things are just going to get worse and due to the oil price been over $112 things for the consumer are just going affect us all in a very negative way.

The government has launched new R1000 bonds but, who is going to have spare cash to buy a bond. I know that the point is to try and get us to save but this does not help the poor who are going to suffer will all the prices soaring every week now.

I will have to further tighten my belt as the many thousands of South Africans do. Last night on the news hundreds of South Africans are leaving for other countries and I cant blame them.

The sad thing is no matter what country you move to the global price of oil is affecting every country and its the poorer countries who are suffering the most.

It does not help quench the anger of the people who riot and loot shops. The innocent who don't have anything to do with the oil price suffer.

I foresee troubled waters for Africa and South Africa is the oil price increases almost on a daily basis. It will cause those who are poor to rise out of desperation and take to the streets.

For once its not our governments fault but they should exempt even more foods from VAT in this time of crisis, so that it can benefit even the poor of the poor.

Allow subsidies for the basic commodities, so that all have access to basic foods.

But of course this is just my personal point of view.

So once again I rethink the possibility of leaving South Africa for another country and been able to work there and work on my projects but that is only a dream for me.

My love for South Africa is unquestionable as well as my loyalty to all its people.

Let us stand together as a nation and give of ourselves and tend to the poor if we can.

Let us take the poor by the hand if we go into a recession and try and assist where ever we can.

Well this is just my point of view guys....

Have a great day..........

Paintings for sale slide show

2008-04-15T21:01:00.001+02:00

I have uploaded photo's of my paintings as a slide show. As you know I have been struggling to save money due to been unemployed for along time.

Previously all my projects where self funded and so are the future ones that are now pending.

I have had to pay for new dentures, spectacles and health cost related issues over the last year.

This year finally I have had the opportunity and blessing to have a job and from this month I am permanent.

Its been along journey to get to this point. I believe that one should work to earn one's keep and I have lived by that policy all my life.

Living with just the basic simple things in life has humbled me and I have never been the materialistic type of person and that has been all my life.

The sad thing is that I have had to swallow my pride earlier regarding the sale of my paintings. I advertised and pleaded for assistance but to no avail. Well at least the people who where interested wanted to buy them at almost no cost, knowing the situation I was in, as with every interview I have been transparent.

So once again here I am again frustrated and struggling to make ends meet. Refusing to solicit but use my own personal items to raise funds.

This is just my nature. I feel so sorry for those who are less fortunate that I am. Continually I count my blessings for what I have.

So if you want to swop your laptop for my paintings please contact me as this will assist me in my projects. If you wish to purchase them for a good cause please email or call me.

Furthermore I don't have more to give or ask.

Many thanks to all my friends.

Remember there are less fortunate people than myself and my heart and soul is always with them.

Mark

Monday 14th Of April 2008 - Reflections

2008-04-14T22:35:00.001+02:00

It seems the whole southern African region has fallen into madness and mayhem. The South African government claims there is no crisis in Zimbabwe but there is. We have a power crisis with one company Eskom who is in a monopoly of providing energy (electricity) but they cant even provide that. We here of price fixing of our basic commodities and this after bread price fixing were exposed.

The poor are suffering and even on my salary with all the increases in foods and all things just in a matter of weeks. Now the reserve bank has pushed up interest rates.

It’s all crazy and I have to be a realist and understand that oil is a major factor in this case.

We have strikes looming by trade unions because of the high prices and I support them in this case which will be rare occasion that I do support a strike. But, where will this lead us except raise the voice of the people who are unhappy and let government hear the people.

The sad thing is normally during these protests or strikes it’s the innocent shop keepers who have their shops Brocken into and goods stolen and for what purpose.

Yes there is a criminal element in all protests and strikes I do understand that but I hope this is going to be a peaceful march for all.

In the mean time there are people in South Africa who do not even have the basic rights as laid down in our constitution to basic, housing, water and so on for over 14yrs and this is a black empowered municipality run region.

What is happening to our leaders no matter what colour or race they are? Have they forgotten the poor and needy?

Coming back to Zimbabwe, the first murder took place and as the MDC warned bloodshed is about to happen. It’s all so sad. In the end it’s the poor orphans and all those in poverty who will suffer. Have not Zimbabwe suffered enough?

Stand together with me and pray for Southern African dear friends and think of us your fellow citizens of the world.

I am tired as it has been along day at work again and tomorrow is another day. I just cant wait until we have the week break, so that I can spend quality time with my family and partner.

Its been such a very long time since I have had a decent break and it would be welcome. I will once again try and sell my paintings and will see if I can get some income from the sales. If you are interested it is listed earlier in this blog as "paintings for sale"

Life is so short and brief and we have to use every available moment to do our very best not just for ourselves but for humanity and I strive every day to do just that.

I am a little stressed as I cant progress in my projects and with the current work load it makes it so difficult. Recently a day or two ago when this computer packed in and we had to format this drive I lost allot of work, but thank god I do have hard copies.

Its been a tough month and I will have to prolong my personal savings for a laptop and I will have to wait another year or a few months before this becomes a realty.

I have said that I do not solicit funds, my entire life I have always supported myself and self funded my projects as a matter of principle and that is what my blog is all about.

Honesty, integrity and freedom of the spirit. I love life to much.

You are most welcome to contact me via email or via the communications hub link and I will respond.

Remember, HIV is not a death sentence but a lifestyle.

Look after those around you and enhance their lives through compassion and of yourself.

Share and empower those in need and you will grow.

I am tired guys and must say good night and you are all in my daily prayers.

On the 20th of May I will be blessed

2008-04-14T07:51:00.001+02:00

On the 20th of May this year my partner upgrades his handset and will be giving this handset to me as he takes my handset. He is really so good to me. This will enable me to be online to you my friends and for all those who are using Skype, MSN, Yahoo and so on.

It will enable all of you to contact me directly when you log onto my blog and I will be able to respond to emails and link to the web no matter where I am.

This is a true blessing to look forward too and I will update you on other issues at hand. It not wi-fi which is my next investment which will put me back a little but heh, that is what is great about life.

To take life by the balls and walk with your head high. I love you all and will keep my promises no matter if it takes a little longer to work on the projects.

Joan de Arc Of France - She believed in her vision and became a great warrior

2008-04-13T17:35:00.001+02:00

Let us not forget our vision and follow this great example of a great woman in our times.

2nd time bitten!

2008-04-13T17:24:00.001+02:00

Well I am fuming once again went to the flea market in Milnerton and bought another Bluetooth headset and when I got home and starting charging the unit it did not charge at all. I am loosing my faith in the integrity of people who promise that items are working and take your money and then it does not work!

On the other hand we picked up some bargains and that was great. Some items where only R5 which was in out budget. So there is good and bad. I am still fuming as I will have to call the manufactures on Monday to try and find out what the cause of the problem is with the headset and take things from there.

In my own life I base it on honesty, transparency and integrity and I expect the same from those whom I meet along the path and journey of life.

But, in realty we know that is not true.

So it's back to the savings plan for me and will have to save over a longer period now as there are two items I would like to get to enhance my life (communications) so that I can help others and continue with my projects.

Yes...I have had three single tots of brandy and coke to calm me down and thank goodness I have great partner who did not bite my head off.

We live such a simple life and even with this minor setback we will survive.

It does not help one to be upset and dwell on things and have negative energies surround you.

Its the excitement of assuming things will work and then having the carpet pulled from under your feet and having to go through all the emotions of disappointment and realty that you have just been through.

To me, well life carries on. The lesson for today is if you buy from a flea market don't expect things to work even if you are told.

Well guys, sigh, its just one of those days and I bid you all a great day and live life to the fullest.

Regards,

Mark

("whine, whine, whine")

President Mandela - A man of substance, love, compassion and a world leader

2008-04-13T08:54:00.001+02:00

Inspirational Quotes - Live your life to the fullest

2008-04-13T08:47:00.001+02:00

Have you performed your random act of kindness today?

A Tribute To Great Philosophers And People Of The World

2008-04-13T08:43:00.001+02:00

Ganhdi A Man Of Peace

Saturday

2008-04-12T22:14:00.001+02:00

Not much to update guys too exhausted, need to rest more and tomorrow I will give a decent update. Had problems with pc at home and have lost alot of work sigh, yet again.

I will just have to put aside more money for a laptop at the end of the month and it will take me another 6 months or so. So for the moment all projects are on hold or go slow due to circrumstances out of my control. That is the computer freezing after a windows update.

So had to format the drive and so on.

Have a blessed night guys.

Embrace life

2008-04-09T22:34:00.001+02:00

The spiritual heart of us all brings much compassion and love to the world. We often loose our way along the path of life through the many storms that may come our way and just disintegrate under the pressures and disappointments.

God in his love touched man from the very begriming of creation and gave man reign over the earth, without war and famine. It is man who has stirred wars and through his thirst for power and own gratification has brought upon himself almost the ruin of the whole world. Yet great men arose from the dust like Gandhi and Mandela who make an impact on the world through their gift of love, forgiveness and compassion.

In return we should embrace those in need and give of ourselves freely and bring joy to all those who are suffering. Bridge the gaps that have been closed and enhance the lives of those in any small way that we can. To share the breath of life and protect those who can not protect themselves. Stand for human rights and stand our ground for the sake of dignity for all the millions out there.

Not to ignore the pleas of help but to do something constructive and proactive.

When you where held in the time of need and your tears where dried, did you not feel comforted and loved? In the same way you can comfort some stranger.

Bury all stigma and rise from the cultural indifferences and shine and let all see that there is still humanity in us all!

I try each day in some small way to make a difference in someone's life.

Let us carry those in our arms when they can no longer fend for themselves. Show compassion and love in all things. There is so much joy and happiness one can receive from helping another.

Hebrews 1:3“The Son is the radiance of God's glory and the exact representation of his being, sustaining all things by his powerful word. After he had provided purification for sins, he sat down at the right hand of the Majesty in heaven.”

Brought to you by BibleGateway.com. Copyright (C) NIV. All Rights Reserved.

I live by faith and love life to the fullest, today was busy at work again and its tiring. Yet I still am strong for myself and my partner. Its more than love that keeps me going. The zeal and passion for others just keep me going. I am so happy when the weekend comes along as this is the only time that I can rest. I am proud of the work that I do even though I may not have all the tools and resources at hand. I am always content in all the things that I do. I have come along way and encourage all those that are HIV+ to love life and not to let it get them down n any way.

As for my work colleagues, if it was not for the daily positive input and support where would I be. In return I work hard and give more than 100% back to them, no matter what they ask.

Friends, once again its time for me to go to bed as I am tired, one day I will go on holiday with my partner and I don't know when that is ever going to be, we will just have to see.

I promise you this, that I will never surrender to HIV but overcome and live a healthy life and keep on with the work that I do. Reaching out to the many souls out there.

Wishing you all a blessed day

Mark Farrell

Tuesday The 8th Of March 2008 Update

2008-04-08T23:03:00.001+02:00

My dear beloved friends and all those who are either affected and infected by HIV/AIDS, greetings and salutations to you all.

Well its been almost three days since my last update. I had a peaceful day at home on Saturday and Autumn has arrived at last. Last week Friday the trees where still green now they are changing colour just two days later. So yippee, winter is around the corner.

I love life and no matter how much I struggle with the dementia and other HIV related issues, I smile and carry on. My strength comes from within my self and the fighter that I am. I am a mere soul who gives his best to humanity to make another life reach the goals they have set.

As tired as I am every day from work, I still read my emails and try my best to reply to all in person, but please forgive me if I am a day or two late.

I am grateful to have a circle of quality friends and acquaintances that surround me on a daily basis. There is one thing although some may hate me for their own personal reasons and may have hurt me, I do not hold any grudge against them and no matter what they have done, I will still greet them and send them a birthday and XMAS card even if they do not do the same. As long as I know that I have dignity and there is no anger when the sun go's down I am content.

There are so many of you out there that don't have the basics of life, please do not give up! If I can make it over these past years so can you.

Yes there is times when I get home and I am sad and depressed but that is human nature but I don't let it control me or affect others. I share my inner feelings and convictions with my partner and have a full transparent relationship and open communication with him all the time.

We both love life to the fullest and one day we both will make great life skill trainers.

The gift I would like to share with you all is patience and consideration for all life.

Let us as men embrace the world with love and compassion. Leave war and our own insecurities behind.

Feed the orphans, poor and needy.

Give of ourselves to the nation and peoples of the world.

Dry the tears of those who cry due to HIV/AIDS, poverty, rape, cold, hunger and loss of family members due to the pandemic.

Stop invading other countries for our own greed, but enhance those countries in need and heal the broken nations through the message of peace and hope.

"O man, embrace your inner self and touch the heart of the world"

Many read my blog every day, I extend my hand out to those who wish to post comments and wish to add to my blog. Join me together we can make a better world for all.

Its never too late to do something or say you are sorry.

On another subject, I have applied for a MediAlert bracelet with my HIV+ status and have provided my medical records. I have taken a step to wear this bracelet in the hope of taking the fear of been HIV+ and the stigma's attached to been open about your personal status. I am aware of the risks I am taking by been open about my status in this way, but I respect the life of others just incase I am in an accident, I would not like to infect others, even by accident.

Its just my personal responsibility to insure not just my own safety but those who will assist me one day in an accident as well.

You are most welcome to comment on this as well. Remember that I have made this choice on my own for no gain except be an example to the many out there, that if you are comfortable with your status and are open with no threat to your own security due to community or other stigma's, then follow my example.

I fear no man except God and that is my personal spiritual belief as only He has total control of your life and destiny.

Romans 5:10“For if, when we were God's enemies, we were reconciled to him through the death of his Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through his life!”
The love of God should be embraced and shared with the world. Fear of the unknown disappeared when I found the unconditional love of God and the depth of his wisdom which I share with those I come across.
I live by example that others may follow no matter what culture or belief they may have.
Let us reconcile our inner insecurities, fears by loving ourselves first and sharing the gift of love and wisdom and live life to the fullest - Mark Farrell "The Rose Of Life (c) 1990-2008

I wish I could do more......................

But there are too little hours in the day and to little days in the year to accomplish the things I would like to do.

Its with this hope in humanity I look toward the future and to see a turn around in the many insecurities regarding HIV/AIDS in the world.

Good night all, rest well you are all in my prayers and in my heart. Please pray for me that he will bless me and that he will provide for me so that I can provide for those in need.

Mark

Sunday 6th Of April 2008

2008-04-06T17:20:00.001+02:00

Well guys I have been replying too many emails today and am trying to get back on track with many outstanding issues regarding future projects and so on. It’s not easy had so little time to attend to all things but as I said it has to be done.

Life is so precious and we need to embrace every second of the day and not waste one iota of time. I still have the passion to tie in between my work and future projects as this keeps me motivated and upbeat. Recently I have had reviews and emails that have brought much joy. There are so many positive outcomes from my blog and is reaching people all over the world. I would like to encourage all those who have written to me to continue living life with dignity and hope.

Implement the coping mechanisms that I have shared and in return you share them with others and inspire their daily life. As you have seen over the many years I have been through some very troubled times and through all of this I have overcome all odds and this by the grace of God.

If I can turn the tide by rechanneling my energies back into the community that they may be blessed as they bless me when I see positive creative results.

You are always welcome to email or contact me about anything, by now you know that I am honest and transparent in all things. If I don’t know the answer I will do research and seek advice from others with wisdom. I will always get back to you.

I am blessed to have so many friends such as you.

I will update soon again.

I live not for myself but for all those affected and infected by HIV/AIDS

Mark Gavin Farrell

markfarrellct@gmail.com

" Our purpose is to serve others... and if you can't serve them, would you at least not hurt them?" Dalai Lama

Home: 021 689 4021

Mobile: 076 280 2833

Fax: 0866 00 2232

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Week in review Sunday 6th April 2008

2008-04-06T10:37:00.001+02:00

Well its been one of those long working weeks again. Busy as hell at work and I still have not had the chance to even work on my project or get around to doing anything. I just have the chance to glance at some emails and reply and then go and rest. Well at least my life returns to normal on Monday when I can rest at home and not take calls as the boss is back.

I can understand when he used to do all these things and more and still have to take calls late at night. He is a person that gives so much of himself and the clients.

Derek and I had dinner at Sauls a local restaurant dance club all combined in Greenpoint. (Sauls The Venue) This was on Monday passed since they run a special for two hamburgers for the price of one. It was great.

We are starting to socialize even though we cant do this all the time as I have said we felt bad when our quality friends always sponsored us. We live a humble life and take all that comes our way with vigour and overcome all the negative energies with positive results. I suppose we are conditioned to accept what life brings our way with a realistic outlook and anticipation.

I have joined Medialert and registered myself for tag to wear incase I become ill or in an accident so that the doctors and ambulance crew are aware of my HIV+ status. I have taken this step in my things to do to set an example that one should not fear having your status known incase of an emergency.

I know that I can but there are many who cant take the step that I have taken. As soon as the tag arrives I will take a photo and publish it here. My personal view is that it is a good idea to have a Medialert tag in any emergency to not only to notify what medication you are on but your entire medical history. I do realise that many cant do this due to stigma and fear but I want to be one of the first to set an public example and be open about my status in this way.

So I will practice what I preach.

Power of the pen

2008-03-29T18:03:00.002+02:00

Wisdom has taught me many great lessons in life. I am colour blind to all races and that includes all cultures be your straight, gay, bi-sexual or what ever your preference many be.

When I look deep within an individual it surpasses all stigma that might be there. It’s a human being that I am seeing. A soul just like mine.

As in the same when I hold a baby or child, that same reaction of appreciation and trust shines from within that tiny individual and it’s up to us to protect them with dignity.

“For I judge no man”

I might disagree and be angry sometimes but I do not let anger go down with the sun. I always seek resolution to any emotion that might be a stumbling block to my peace and those around me.

To have experienced immense pain during times of illness has been a privilege that I may have the courage to face another day and in return empower others to overcome the same.

Having survived a 120km car crash last year, I am even more blessed than before. God has a wonderful purpose in each of our lives.

There have been times when I have had nothing to eat for days and due to my pride have not begged but have managed to survive.

As in the history of my blog and the many things that have happened to me and surviving the odds, can only be by the grace of God.

Since I contracted HIV my whole spiritual life has blossomed and no matter how bad or strong the storms have been, and believe me they have been like tornado, I have always come out on top.

That does not mean I have not been depressed, that would be only foolish to say something like that.

My strength comes from Him and he is my hope in mankind.

I weep at the sight of all South Africans and of course Africa. I wish I could do so much more to enhance the lives of others and I believe that one day my book “The Rose Of Life Living With HIV” will become a best seller and enhance thousands of lives and with the money I get, I will plough it back into the communities that need so many things.

I may lack so many things which may be simple to many and are a luxury to me but to others it’s a normal thing.

I have accepted the gift of life and to give the very best to the “NATION OF SOUTH AFRICA AND ALL ITS PEOPLES”

Embrace what you have and build upon a strong foundation that will make you strong. Be not afraid to share a tear.

Show compassion to all. Let not your flame not blow out in the storm, but may its embers ignite the dying flames of others.

Be not afraid of the unknown and let it hold you back.

Hold on to what you are and never let anyone change you, for no one has the right to take away your inner being.

Be strong and remember my words, for I am the servant of all not just one individual!

I serve first the nation before myself

Mark Gavin Farrell

Pearl of wisdom for the day

2008-03-29T16:53:00.004+02:00

Look deep within your heart and see the inner beauty of yourself. Embrace life and wisdom.
Let not the follies of man influence you, but depend on guidance from wisdom and your spirituality.
Avoid conflict of the foolish and surround yourself with those whom embrace equality, dignity, respect, honesty and unconditional love.
For you have one life and there is only one you, use your precious time to make the very best of life and all those that come across your path.
Mark

Thursday update

2008-03-27T21:28:00.002+02:00

Well it was another long day at work and I as usual I did not eat at all today until we got home. The pressure is getting to Derek as he is strained with the work load and was in pain again and in a bad mood and went to bed early after doing some work online.

When he is in the mood, the best thing for me is to keep quiet and give him understanding and support and let him cool down.

I cant help but look on the humorous side of life. I am going to have to shelve my project once again until such time as I can afford a lap top since (sigh) I have had no feedback on the sale of my paintings.

Within myself my inner sanctum, I still have the strong belief that things will come to pass. I have to be a realist and put all my energy's into my current path of life but continue daily with sharing and uplifting all those that come my way.

No matter how tough things have been over the past years and are now, never to give up the glimmer of hope in the humanity of mankind.

I am too tired, got into bed at 8pm last night. Now I am going to bed. Please no matter how bad your day has been, don't let the sun go down with anger or sadness.

Your life is to precious to let it pass by with negative energies. You are special and an individual like no other on this planet.

Love and nurture your self.

Forgive me I am tired but will update this blog tomorrow.

My friends fly's back home to Germany and I have only seen him once since he and partner have arrived last weekend.

Its sad that I have not spent more time with him due to circumstances out of my control.

Good night all sleep well

Mark